Fat Fight
I, like many people have battled weight issues a good part of my life. Despite what many “skinny” people will claim, it is not a “choice.” Is it something I can do something about? In my case, yes. At least I have managed to do it before, and with weight loss of almost 16 pounds since April 17th, I am making some progress again.
But this isn’t really about that fight. No, this is something that has been simmering since my Step-Father-In-Law passed away from Lung Cancer last year. It bothered me at the time, but I wasn’t completely sure why, but there was a gnawing at me about this. Mostly, I guess because I felt it was so unfair that by the time it was “discovered” he was given six-to-nine months and didn’t last that long, that I dismissed what was bothering me as just the sort of bitterness you have when you lose a loved one to illness.
Well, a couple of weeks ago, my uncle was diagnosed with Lung cancer. Fortunately, in his case, it is currently considered early enough that while the long term prognosis is not good (can it ever be?), there actually IS so far, a long term prognosis. Something, that my Step-Father-In-Law never “enjoyed.” I started rethinking it, and using “the Google” to seek some others information and similar type of incidents and stories. I probably shouldn’t be shocked in this day and age to actually find a Blog dedicated to the topic of fat prejudice in health care. This is exactly what was bothering me all this time, and a couple of delicately placed questions to my mother-in-law confirmed this.
He had complained of shortness-of-breath and several other symptoms for quite some time before his diagnosis. Every time his Primary Care Physicians “diagnosis” was that he needed to lose weight, and that then it would no longer be an issue. Symptoms overlooked, simply because, well if you are fat… that is the problem and the end of the effort by the physician (in these cases).
I would love to think that this is infrequent and isolated with a few “bad seeds,” but when you see things like, UNC-Chapel Hill: Obesity May Keep Some Women from Getting Screened for Breast, Cervical Cancer it seems clear that this is not the case, and Kate Harding has a excellent breakdown of this story and how (and why) this issue exists. (On a side note, Kate’s Shapely Prose blog is an excellent read.) There are even studies published on the Stigma and Discrimination in Weight Mangement and Obesity.
Of course, the media is not much help in this regard either. Yes, there are some articles that point properly at some causes and issues, but doing so is “too politcally correct” for some writers, and just a lifestyle choice for others. Of course even some governments get involved as well when they do something like tell a person that they are ‘too fat to adopt.’
It is like continuing to get picked on by the school yard bully for being overweight. Only the sonsequences to your health could be far more severe.
Just Because… OK?
I’ve been stewing on this one a while, and while I have made mention of it before, it was always just more of an afterthought; but after encountering it yet again this past weekend, I think I have finally had enough. By now I am sure most of you (well all three of you), are saying “get to the point” so I will. Why is it that “everybody” (especially it seems older people, and for some reason very religious people) seem to have this particularly invasive idea that they have the right (or almost responsibility) to inquire about your reproductive plans? Oh, and if that isn’t enough, then they are going to judge you on it based on what they have determined is the “right” thing.
When TheWife and I were first married, it was the constant (and somewhat typical) question of “when are you going to start a family?” The fact that we waited 6 years was almost unconscionable to some people and family members. I won’t even get into what my poor sister has to go through since she and her husband have opted to not have children. For these people, can I just point out that people actually get married for reasons other than to start pushing out children.
Of course, fortunately the reason that we did not have a child right away was because of choice. I know (both in real life, and many others that I have come to know through blogging) that haven’t because of medical problem. This of course serves to act as a big slap in the face, and can (and usually does) open some painful emotions in people struggling to have a child, when these reproductive nazis…er… well intended individuals, come along and decide to poke their noses in and demanding answers.
Lately, the new question has come up about when are we going to have another child (now with the extra bonus of them reminding me that I am not getting any younger). The incredulous looks and shocked to downright snarky replies we get when we say we are done with one is a sight to behold. You would think that I had just put an end to the chances of the human race’s chance of survival. Then they begin the prodding, because they all need to know the “real” reason. Is it physical problems? Is there something wrong with LatteGirl that makes of afraid of another child? Is it money? (because apparently when you have enough kids, you can live on love) Wouldn’t it be easier to have more if TheWife didn’t work? (That one of course is insulting on assorted levels and goes into other issues I am not going to touch now) They just cannot accept that this was the choice we made. I had somewhat jokingly come up with the response of “We can only afford to raise and spoil one properly” just to try and head off the amount of time I would have to deal with their probing questions. But to be honest, I am tired of using it as an answer, because I see no reason that I should feel compelled to answer.
The answer is “Just Because” and I am done with it. LatteGirl is quite well adjusted thank you, and I know plenty of other only children at various stages of life to know that being an only child does not guarantee that they will not know how function in society as you seem to like to claim. While I like to use the term, somewhat loosely “spoiled” she certainly isn’t. She knows and has boundaries, she can play well with others, and is able to wait her turn, and doesn’t expect to always be first, just because that is “what she has always known” without competition from siblings. I don’t question your choice to have more than one child, even if it means going beyond your financial means (well, except for you Michelle and Jim Bob Duggar!! 17 kids? WTF is wrong with you people?) .
While I am busy annoying people today, let us take a side rant here. Why is it that people are against the use of condoms, or birth control because it “messes up” some divine plan, and that if “god” (or your personal choice of term) sees fit to bless you with a child, you should not “interfere” with this plan… but yet these same people seem to have absolutely no problem with fertility clinics and drugs that attempt to help in difficult situations (just to be clear, I do not have a problem with EITHER situation, I just don’t understand why messing with “the plan” is OK when you want to have a child, but not when you don’t). Simiarly confusing to me is why there is nobody protesting, bombing or trying to shame men that go to a place that offers a vasectomy. Doesn’t that mess with “the plan” as well?
What does this little side rant have to do with anything? Well, it really all ties up quite nicely in the end… Stay the hell out of our choices. My wife and I will choose what is best for us. And the only reason I will give from now on is “Just Because!”
Is that an RFID in your pocket or …
Despite what some people may think, I am not all about government intrusion in our lives, but the government is supposed to be there to protect the people, especially from the likes of monolithic corporate giants that have nobody’s interest at heart but their own.
Why isn’t that the case any longer? Why do special interest groups always get their way? (Yes, I know it is all about the money and re-election funds… it was a rhetorical question. Just follow… OK?) An excellent example is the recent first in the country RFID laws passed in Washington State.
In case you haven’t been paying attention, RFID chips are being put into and used in “everything” now, or at least they will be very soon. That “touch-less” Gas-N-Go card you have from the Station? RFID, Those new “intelligent” passports that are coming? RFID, the new digital Drivers Licenses that are being rolled out? RFID. Even some of those frequent shoppers cards. You have a lot of information that is now accessible, just by walking past an RFID reader set to grab that information.
Now rightly, there is cause for concern, and the laws they were pushing in Washington made sense. There were basically two parts; the first is making it illegal for anybody to attempt to access your information for fraudulent purposes. Rather obvious, and somewhat redundant, since fraud is already illegal, but I guess this would be another tacked on charge, or perhaps you can simply be arrested for “attempted” fraud. Whatever, I don’t have a problem with that. If somebody is “skimming” my information, then sure he should get in trouble for it without me having to be an actual fraud victim. But then there is the second part of the law, or more correctly, the original bill… because it never made it into the law.
That part, required retailers and other businesses to only gather information about you on an opt-in basis. As is always the case… it seems, the retailers and their lobbyist fought this part of the law, and eventually got it pulled out. So, now skimming is only illegal for an individual; corporations that are skimming are free to gather information about you, how long you shopped in their stores, where in the store you went, how much time you spent in each section, just by strategically placing some RFID scanners, and you will be none the wiser as they gather this information.
But don’t worry, I am sure some company will come out with some sort of RFID blocking wallet, that will be ugly, cumbersome and expensive, but will “protect” you from the “snoops.” Yup that is right, to have the privacy you should expect by default… you will have it. As long as you pay for it. (Maybe!)
Why do children have to die for common sense laws?
Abigail Taylor died Thursday from injuries sustained last June when when she sat on a wading pool drain; the suction so strong that it suck out part of her intestines. It is always a tragedy when a child dies, and always there is some knee-jerk reactions, some good and sometimes even some not so go. But when it happens for something incredibly stupid, it is all that much more infuriating.
On the heels of this incident, in December Congress approved legislation to “ban the manufacture, sale or distribution of drain covers that don’t meet anti-entrapment safety standards.” It was called the Virginia Graeme Baker Pool and Spa Safety Act [pdf], the named for the granddaughter of former Secretary of State James A. Baker, III, who was killed when she was trapped by the suction of a drain in 2002!
Now, I don’t understand why this wasn’t already a law, because it seems so brain-dead obvious to me as a parent, but can somebody explain to me, even after the first incident, and when people started lobbying for this law in 2002, it took 5 freakin’ years to get this written into law? Now, I am willing to bet if I left it at that, I would have somebody come along and say “there’s a war on and Congress had ‘more important’ things to contend with.” But if that is the case, then can somebody explain to me why Abigail Taylor had to die when over those same five years Congress sat back, played IM games with Pages, stuffed freezers full of cash, taking bribes, and making medical diagnosis via videotape. They had “the time” to do it, but it seems unless there is enough dead children for them to stop taking donations from corporations that are too cheap to manufacture these things safely, they just allow it to go on.
Propoganda: Not just for foreign countries
It has been long known that the U.S. Military (along with many others, this is not a American phenomenon), uses propaganda in times of war. Planes littering villages with leaflets, buying of air time and ads in newspapers in a sort of psychological warfare. But tactics like these are (or were) supposed to be strictly controlled; as a matter of fact by trying to be more coy about it, the United States came under fire when they admitted they were planting stories in Iraq newspapers as “news articles.”
But it certainly seems that those days of propaganda planting being kept out of our news streams is history. Oh sure, it has been blatantly obvious for some time that the Faux News Channel is little more than “right wing mouthpiece” and tries to twist things to fit that image, but certain talk shows hosts aside (*cough* Hannity, O’Reilly *cough*) the data is usually twisted but not typically made up. Not so in this recent false article planted in Time Magazine. Glenn Greenwald over at Salon.com has done a nice job of comparing the unsubstantiated (false) claims in the Time article piece, with something that the author of the Time article couldn’t be bothered with, facts and numbers.
It is really sad, that you now have to be critical about everything you read. It is at a point where I trust very few sources of information outside my blogroll. I may not agree with all of you all the time, but at least there, I know if people don’t know, they don’t know, they don’t just make up the facts as they go along.
It really is a sad place we are in right now.
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