“Atheism is a non-prophet organization. ”

“Fighting for peace is like screwing for virginity.”

“I have as much authority as the Pope, I just don’t have as many people who believe it.”

“A house is just a pile of stuff with a cover on it”

“I was thinking about how people seem to read the Bible a whole lot more as they get older; then it dawned on me – they’re cramming for their final exam.”

“You know the good part about all those executions in Texas? Fewer Texans.”

“Think of how stupid the average person is, and realize half of them are stupider than that.”

“Here’s a bumper sticker I’d like to see: “We are the proud parents of a child who’s self-esteem is sufficient that he doesn’t need us promoting his minor scholastic achievements on the back of our car.”

“What was the best thing before sliced bread?”

“Death is caused by swallowing small amounts of saliva over a long period of time.”

I was lamenting growing another year older, saying that I am starting to just feel older now.  LatteGirl came over to console me (or so I thought), she sat and cuddled with me on the chair, and said:

“You know how you could feel extra special and young again?  A baby!  You and Mommy should have a baby sister for me.  That will make you feel young again.”

The problem with America is stupidity. I’m not saying there should be a capital punishment for stupidity, but why don’t we just take the safety labels off of everything and let the problem solve itself?

-Author Unknown (to me anyway)