I don’t know when it happened that I got so old… but there are times that events remind me that I am starting to think and act like an old guy and that I am just not a kid any longer.  Case in point was this past Friday.  I was in Dallas for a trade show, and the last day of the show, most of the people from the event checked out and left, but we did not have a flight out until Saturday.   Thanks to that, while we were closing up our booth, our hotel transformed while we were gone.

Gone were the show attendees, and in came many, many (I mean MANY) kids (and some families) from the University of Texas (Hook ‘Em Horns) and the Oklahoma University (Boomer Sooner).  Awash in a sea of Orange (Texas) and Red (Oklahoma), I watched somewhat amused at first seeing this group of kids acting like a bunch of country bumpkins in the “big city”  (Side Note:  Being from the NY area, I guess I have much higher expectations of what to find in “The City” and Dallas was sorely lacking in this regard).

But as night fell, my amusement shifted a bit.  As I watched them get dressed up and head out for a night on the town, my amusement changed to somewhere between disbelief or dismay.  I watched as normal young girls turned into Bratz Dolls.  I say that because, it was so stunning that I couldn’t believe it was real, it was more like a campy 80′s comedy sort of slutty, trashy look that was so far over the top that it was almost (I said almost) comical.  As I saw one walk out of the hotel to meet with her friends wearing 4″ (or better) clear platform shoes, I couldn’t help but utter to my parter, “When did this turn into hookers on parade?”

And then I thought about my little princess.  And a cold chill ran down my spine.  ”Oh, hell no,” I said to nobody in particular.  She is not going to be anywhere near something like this.  I am locking her up and bringing in tutors.  Perhaps I should take her to see Tangled when it comes out this fall… this way she has an idea of how long I expect her to be locked up.

I went to college in the 80′s during the era of Madonna, and mini-skits, and falling of the body oversized sweatshirts, and still by our standards, “these kids today” seem to be out there.  I don’t know.  Am I just getting old?  Are you afraid of what it is going to be like “out there” when your kids are ready to strike out on their own?

I know it is not (just) me, since I have heard similar complaints from others.  I’m not exactly when it happened, though I suspect it was when I started doing things on my own and away from my parents, but somewhere along the line a vacation stopped being about going somewhere to relax and recharge, and instead turned into something that I needed a vacation from when I returned.

My parents were not really beach people, and I think there was a grand total of one time that we actually went to the shore, and that was only because my uncle lived near the beach on Long Island for a brief time.  So, when I started to drive, my first and almost weekly summer destination became the Jersey Shore.  But of course in your late teens/early 20′s sleep is not something you are all that concerned about.  Hitting the beach, roller blading on the boardwalk, closing clubs as many nights as possible..,. it was all about fun (not that there is anything wrong with that) but typically meant I was no more rested then when I left.

Later, when we could afford it, the trips moved from the shore to the islands.  Aruba (honeymoon), Bahamas a couple of times, etc.  But since (except for our honeymoon) we couldn’t afford full weeks in these locations, we would jet out for a 4 day weekend, Leaving Thursday and returning on Sunday.  Other than the location though the routine was very similar.  Lots of swimming (with swim up bars), night life, casinos, and then zip back home.  On Monday when I got back to work, I needed a vacation to recover from my vacation.

Of course, once the princess came along it became all about her.  Sesame Place, Hershey Park, Disney,and of course back to the Jersey Shore, since I was not going to keep her away from the beach like my parents did to me.  But as anyone who has to deal with a little one on vacation knows, relaxation and little ones do not go hand in hand.  It is all about keeping them occupied and entertained.  It is about crafts, and rides, and I wanna do this, I wanna do that, I’m bored, and the like.  While I was no longer staying up until all hours of the night, I was no more rested than I was on any other vacation.

Now I have written about our vacations about Chestnut Grove in the Poconos before… here (and here and a couple of more), so I won’t rehash the details of it again (Your Welcome).  For the past 5 years we have gone there, and I realized this year (a little dense maybe) what it is that is so really great about it.  It is not the accomodations (they are very basic), it is not the activities (though I enjoy them, I know the schedule like the back of my hand), it is not the food (which is good, but again, more homestyle than 5 star).  It is about 2 things.  The first is that as luck would have it, we met some really great people  the week of our vacation.  And since this is a place that people return year after year, we get to enjoy our vacation with these same people every year (and LatteGirl has friends that she has made and kept over those years).  It is all very predictable to an extent.  The way I described it to one person is that it is a vacation that is a lot like a Yatzee Cup.  Much like you have 5 dice, all the same, the vacation sports the same people, the same food, the same location every time.  But like when you shake that Yatzee cup and roll the dice, despite everything being the same, each year like each roll, brings different results.  We interact more with some people and less with others.  There are variables out of our control like the rain we had this year for the first 3-1/2 days.  Getting calls from work that briefly interrupts my activites, and everything else.  So while everything seems to be the same, the results come out different.

But the best thing of all is that I come home relaxed.  When I get home, I feel a bit nostalgic and sad about saying goodbye to the friends I will not see for another year (well, except perhaps on Facebook), I feel recharged.  I feel rested.  I feel ready to take on the world again.  And isn’t that what a vacation is supposed to do?

Now don’t get me wrong, I don’t regret any of the vacations and trips of the past, and certainly seeing new places and things is good.  I’m not saying that this vacation is for everybody.  And I am certainly going to be going on vacations like the trip to Disney World we are planning for 2011 where I will be more worn out (and broke) than I am now, but if you haven’t done so, I highly recommend finding a vacation that is about recharging you… whatever that means to you.  If it surfing great.  Hiking in the mountains.  You don’t have to be sedentary to be rested.  But you do need something that will allow you to be yourself.  To forget about the trials and tribulation of the everyday.  Go ahead… find your smile.  That is after all what it is all about.

Well, she is supposed to be my baby… but at 10 years old she doesn’t like to be called that any longer.  I accept that I have to come to terms with that.  But worse than that (for me), she acts and speaks a whole lot more mature than even her 10 years!  What do you think?  Let me give you some examples:

Exhibit 1 – After taking her to a Newark Bears Game (her 1st baseball game), that the Bears lost (by a lot).

Me:  I hope you still had fun even though the Bears lost.

Her:  I had a GREAT time.  I got to spend time with family and friends, and that is always fun.  The final score doesn’t matter.

Exhibit 2 – After I try and select a movie to watch for Daddy-Daughter Night

Me:  What do you think of this one?

Her:  This is PG-13… are you sure it is age appropriate for me?

Exhibit 3 – After her aunt asked her if she still was watched Hannah Montana

Her:  The show isn’t entertaining any more, and her music isn’t as good as it used to be, so I’ve moved on to other things.

Aunt:  So what do you like now?

Her:  Bad Romance  by Lady Gaga (this one just about killed me on multiple levels)

Exhibit 4 – After seeing a commercial for Zhu-Zhu Pets

Me:  Have you ever seen them before?

Her: (Unenthusiastically) Yeah, I’ve seen ‘em

Me:  Not interested, huh?

Her:  Nah, maybe when I was younger, but now I don’t think I would play with them enough to justify the expense.

So, like it or not she is growing up… far faster than I would like… but fortunately not as quickly as her maturity level would suggest.  Is it just her?  Is it just me being in denial?  Do your kids act far more mature than you would expect for their age?

Edgardo Alfonso playing for the Newark Bears

I am… in general, a sports fan.  Except possibly for hockey, I am not a sports “fanatic” (much to my wife’s appreciation, and probably to the chagrin of many major sports and their advertisers).  No place has my hot and cold fickleness been more apparent than it has been with baseball.  Baseball has broken my heart (not in the “my team lost” kind of way), disgusted me, annoyed me and turned me off to their product more times than I care to count over the years.

Now, in fairness, I guess some of it does have to do with “my” team.  A fan of the New York Mets (on again and off again), I have watched an organization assemble a team  that has had the character of a hot steaming pile of garbage (more than once).  Bobby Bonilla, Vince Coleman, Bret Saberhagen to name just a few from “The Worst Team Money Could Buy” club. Sure, there are players like that in every sport, those types quickly fade away and are out of the game, not given additional lucrative contracts.

But it goes beyond just “my” team. Barry Bonds, Jose Canseco, Mark Maguire and others that ran up home run totals as MLB looked the other way, allowing the long ball to try and bring fans back after the 94-95 baseball strike. Oh, and yeah… baseball work stoppages. Does any “union” have less of a reason for its members to go on strike than Major League Baseball Players? (And yes, I blame the owners as well, this is not just the players, but the teams themselves willing to shell out millions of dollars while pricing fans right out of the game in favor of corporate sponsorship and high priced suites, etc).

Armando Benitez

So, I have been in my “off again” part of my relationship with baseball, for what has been probably the longest stretch of time, somewhere around 7 years. As part of a writeup I was (well I am still am technically) looking to do on New Jersey sports, I went to see and photograph a Newark Bears game.  Never did I imagine that one evening in a ballpark would remind me about every single factor about what I used to love about the game on so many different levels.

The evening was a perfect storm of things that roped me back in.  The last time I was at a baseball game, which happen to be a Shea Stadium, some of the best players on the field that day included Edgardo Alfonso and Armando Benitez and much to my surprise, those two players were there… sporting Newark Bears uniforms, in fact the Bears have no less than 5 former major league players on their roster, adding for Angel and Cardinal Scott Spiezio, former journeyman pitcher Willie Banks and Daryl Ward who was most recently played with the Chicago Cubs.  The remainder of the team is made up of players that never quite got their shot, or perhaps haven’t gotten their shot yet for one reason or the other in the “big leagues.”

Now without trying to make people out to be more altruistic than they really are, I am sure that their is certainly some money factor involved.  Every one of these guys would, if the opportunity presented itself, to jump (or jump back) to the MLB level and the payday that could involve, but their is still something different about players at this level of baseball.  When all is said and done, these players are playing with pride, with determination, with heart that far exceeds whatever nominal salary they are making at this level of play.  They have to play that way if they want to get noticed.  It is palpable, you can “feel” the difference in effort, and while it is true that the level of play may not be quite as high as the majors, the hustle and effort factor, for me more than makes up for it.

I watched not only the game on the field, but the few fans that made it out for a game on a weeknight while school is still in.  It was a very sparse crowd watching the game, and so far the Bears are sitting in last place, but that did not affect any of the young kids (or even the adults) in attendance.  They cheered their team, they begged players for autographs, took photographs with the mascot, and chased down foul balls into the stands. You couldn’t tell by the enthusiasm and excitement in their eyes that this was a “lesser” game than one in an MLB ballpark.  Seeing the kids enjoying this game, brought back some really great memories of going to baseball games with my dad when I was a kid.  We went to games both at Yankee Stadium as well as Shea, but there was no difference between those games for me, than when we went to Roosevelt Stadium in Jersey City to see the Oakland A’s Double A team play.  It was very cool to watch these kids with that excitement.

I even got a little bit of excitement of my own.  Like any kid that has ever attended a game, I always wished for that opportunity to catch a ball hit into the stands, but it never happened, and as I sat there, I watched one young boy that dutifully attempted to dash from his seat and try and run down any ball hit on his side of the stadium (did I mention the crowd was sparse this day?).  But other, older and faster kids always beat him to the ball.  They were roaming free around the stadium, while he sat next to his dad right behind the visiting team dugout (it was a very sparse crowd), meaning he really had no shot, but he got his hopes up each time, only to have them dashed, and walk dejected back to his seat.  I knew that look… and that feeling, all too well.  I remembered being that kid.

One happy kid

As we went to the home 6th inning, I was once again on the visitors side of the field so I could get some pictures of the lefty hitters due up at the plate.  The first player up was Scott Spiezio.  After getting several pictures with my camera, I quickly switched over to my phone so I could share a picture via TwitPic as well.  As I snapped that shot, he fouled off the pitch, and it was headed straight for me.  With my camera in my right hand, I stood, and reached out with my left.  At 44 years old, I caught my first foul ball at a game.  Almost directly below me, I saw the young boy (who was now being aided by his father in his quest to get a baseball hit into the stands) looking up.  He was, he felt thwarted again and began to make his way back to his seat.  I beckoned to his father, pausing to speak to him first and to get his approval (sadly in this day and age, such steps I feel must be taken), and gave the ball to the boy who was a mixture of elated… and stunned.  I posted about it on twitter, and received some nice comments from people about how nice I was to do such a thing.  But, for me, I think anybody with kids, in the same circumstances would do the same.  Besides, I think I got more out of it, than if I had actually taken the baseball home.  I got the memory of catching that ball.  I got the memory of how thrilled that kid was to get that ball, his smile as he grabbed and stared at that baseball will stay with me longer than a dusty baseball on a shelf.  To top off the evening, the last place Bears went on to win 4-2.

So, I got to see some players I used to love to watch in “the pros,”  a night a great baseball, the first baseball I caught in a game, some great memories, and my love of baseball back.  Quite the bargain for a $10 seat, don’ t you think?

First of all, Happy Mother’s Day to all the Moms out there.  New Moms, Old Moms, Grand Moms as well as the soon to be Moms.  But, for a bit of a change-up here, I want to throw out a special Thank You to two other Moms that often get left out, or worse get somehow “downgraded” by uncaring, unfeeling or just folks that aren’t thinking too clearly.  Those are the Moms that knew enough that they were unable to take care of a child that they had brought into the world and made the very difficult and unselfish decision to give that child up for adoption, and also for those Moms that, whether they couldn’t or simply chose to go the adoption route, gave homes to those children.

I have to admit, it took a lot of soul searching on my part, as well as finally getting to know some people on the other side of the equation to really appreciate the plight of the mother that has given up a child for adoption.  I was going to say “every adopted child” but I really can’t speak for others, so I will say “I” with the understanding that I don’t think that I am really all that different from other adopted children… anyway, I went through a time of wondering “why.”  Why didn’t my mother want me?  What was wrong with me?  And similar questions.  Combine that with many in the general public that seem to think that the only children that are given up for adoption are from people that are shirking their responsibilities as parents, or are “lazy” or “don’t care” or other more hateful things, and it is not difficult to draw a picture in your mind is rather unpleasant.  (Perhaps it is a way of coping… it is easier to think bad things about somebody else, than to question if it is you that is the problem.)

Are situations like that sometimes true… of course. But in all actuality, that is not always the case.  Circumstances are what they are.  Things happen in life. And a woman gets pregnant with a child.  One that she knows damn well she is not in a position to raise properly, and rather than “dragging up” a child though a bad situation, she makes the rather unselfish decision to allow that child to be put up for adoption.  That certainly can’t be an easy decision to make.  And from the few women I know that have done this, it can be (and usually is) quite anguishing… not just at the time of the decision but for years to come (if not forever).  So rather than pick on or chastise or ridicule somebody in that situation, I think it is better to say “Thank You.”  Thank you for being wise enough to know that you would not be able to handle the situation.  Thank You for being unselfish enough to try and make something work that you know would not.

Now follow the strange path that is my brain to the other side of the equation.  The adopting mother.  There are few things in life that annoy me more (which is sort of counter-intuitive to what I just wrote), than to have somebody ask me (and I can’t tell you how many times I have been asked, I lost count long ago) if I am going to try and find my “real” mom.  To this my answer is always the same, “I know where my real mom is, she still lives in the same house that I grew up in.”  Though my mother skirts the issue when asked about it, I know there were people in the family that scoffed that mother was not able to “give my father children.”  There were riffs in the family that lasted many years.  My mother actually went on to forgive one uncle (though I never did).  I find this sort of sentiment unacceptable.  What is not “real” about an adoptive mother?  She is the woman that sacrificed for me, got up to feed me, dealt with illnesses, and driving me to Little League games, always made sure I had a healthy and nutritious meal.  She loved me when I was good.  She loved me when I was a complete and total screw up.  If you think a maternal bond can only come with an umbilical cord, you are sadly mistaken.  I have seen plenty of mothers that had less instincts and love towards children that they gave birth to, than my mother showed to me.

I no longer harbor any resentment or questions (other than health related ones, an issue any adopted child has to deal with) for the woman that gave birth to me.  I wish her well, and an appreciative Thank You.  I don’t know how my life would have turned out if she had not put me up for adoption, nor do I really care.  I know I wound up having a simply wonderful mother, one that loves me, and I love very much.  And in the end, that is all that really matters.  Happy Mothers Day.

I’m sure some will see me as harsh, and even suggest things like “look at it from her perspective” or “she is just a kid” but in all honesty, right now I don’t care.  Destiny Hope… excuse me… Miley Ray, I think forgot who put her where she is today, and gave her what she has.  The young teen and tween fans (well really… us, the parents of those fans), the one’s she is now discarding because she “knows who she is” according to her latest write up in Parade Magazine.

’ My job first is to entertain and do what I love, and if you don’t like it, then change the channel. I’m not forcing you to watch me. I’m not forcing you to talk about me. I would do that pole dance a thousand times again, because it was right for the song and that performance. But, dude, if you think dancing on top of an ice-cream cart with a pole is bad, then go check what 90% of the high schoolers are really up to. It’s funny. I don’t know if a lot of parents remember what they were like as kids. But I’m like, ‘Dude, as if you were an angel!’”

She sighs. “I’ve learned I can’t live for what people are going to say. People are so judgmental—especially parents.

That is right Miley, we are judgemental. We are the ones that decide what concerts our children go to see, and what music they buy, and we decide what they watch because we are concerned parents.  And, if you don’t like that… then fine, I am taking my child AND my wallet and going home.

Yes, it is true that you are just a kid (despite what you probably think right now, being a rich, snot nosed teen), and of course you are going to make mistakes.  But, treat the people that spent the Billions of Dollars on you… and make no mistake about this… because Disney packaged you and sold you perfectly, those people are not going to be there after you keep up the “I don’t care about you attitude.”

Now, some of my anger is probably not Miley’s fault really.  I remember sitting with my little girl, excited that a new episode of Hannah Montana was coming on.  The songs didn’t make my ears melt (like Jonas does now), the acting wasn’t awful (unlike That’s so Raven) and I actually liked and felt I understood Billy Ray’s caring and worrying about his little girl.  I was on some level able to connect with the show almost as much as my daughter.  And having those times together is something I will always cherish.

But time does move on.  My daughter outgrew the show… I guess.  Either that or she (like I) realized that the show now stunk and was no longer entertaining.  Of course, I had  placed most of the blame on the writer’s strike thinking it took the show out of its rhythm.  Little did I know, it was thanks to the fact that you had turned into a prima donna that “hated” being a popular actress in a hit television show, because you didn’t like the outfits you had to wear.  It is called acting.  Not all your roles (assuming you get any more), are not going to “allow you to be who you are.”  I had a point.. oh yeah… time moves on, and it was time for the show to say good-bye.  And I will fondly remember the 1st two seasons, and the time I spent with my daughter watching Hannah Montana.  For that I say Thank You, and Hannah… you will be missed.

But Miley, you are now the pompous ass people have been saying you are turning into.  Something I refused to believe originally, when people were comparing some of your indiscretions into the same sort of self-implosion that  marred Britney Spears.  I fought and defended you, certain that your parents would be able to help you navigate your way through and avoid the big headed pompous attitude that ruins so many people that get fame too fast and too early.  But apparently, you know better since your parents “aren’t stoked” about your choices, but you don’t care.

I hope, for your sake I am wrong, but if you are paying attention, you are already starting to fade.  Disney is going to get whatever last bit of juice they can squeeze out of you with this stint as a “mentor” on American Idol.  I know you “don’t care” what people think, but you just might want to take a peek at the Entertainment magazines and just find out how much of a joke the general public and entertainment experts think of this idea.  But Disney might get a quick boost of viewers for Idol like they did with Dancing with the Stars when they milked your fandom multiple times with you, your dad and Cody Linly.

In one of those conversation you have with you dad, you just might want to ask him how fleeting stardom is.  Without Disney, you would just be the best singer at the Tennesee State Fair, and if you don’t mind you business and fans a bit better, that is where you might be again.  Good Riddance Miley… not that you care.

Hey… I have a blog.  Yeah, I didn’t forget it… but it certainly does look like I did.  However, a new look, new content, and hopefully a new attitude, will be coming this way… uh… soon.  I’ve got a lot of plans for it… just have to get to those darn details.

Testing out WP ToGo, so I can blog on the go from Disney. If you are reading this, then everything worked and I am all set.

I have always been lucky in that for the most part I have been able to work doing things that I enjoy doing.  Sometimes it meant getting paid for what I do, other times it meant doing it for fun.  Back in the late 90′s I did a website based on vacationing at the Jersey Shore, purely as a project of love.  As the world of blogging took over my focus, I had given up on the venture promising on day to return to it, and possibly reinvent it as a vaction blog of where to go and what to do when on vacation in New Jersey.

Imagine my surprise, when Whit provided me with the opportunity to do it as part of a project on a much grander scale.  Anyway, due to some slip ups, I am only getting started, but I will be joining a band of most excellent bloggers (check out the About Us page for the list of stars I will be trying to live up to) , writing at UpTake.com.

Yesterday was actually the official launch, and you can check out the official launch of their Travel Network Blog.  For those that like read such things, there is even an official press release of the launch event (that I missed), for everybody else, just go and check out everything they have to offer, because with real reviews and blogs written by real people and not, say… imaginary gnomes, UpTake is … Your first Step to a Great Trip.

I have been planning for quite some time now to bring back TechParent Tuesday, but I wanted to do something a little more focused than the radom reviews that I had been doing previously.  Now, unless you have been living under a rock for the past year or so, I am sure you are aware or have at least heard of using “the cloud” for your computing, the theory that the OS is becoming irrelevant and that everything you do is or will be available on the web.  

This concept in not new.  In days past, when companies like Sun Micrososystems were touting, “The network is the computer” and Netscape that was talking about a BrowserOS, the idea was half baked.  We didn’t have the tools or the abilities yet actually have a full rewarding experience without the underlying OS doing the heavy lifting.  If you wanted to do “web e-mail” sure many of the same players, Yahoo, Hotmail, etc were around, but you got 2MB of storage, and a slow interface that had to refresh with every click.  Tolerable, but certainly not what you would want to live your life in.  There were also many pieces of the puzzle still missing, so while you could do some things online, you could not do everything.

When the first netbooks started appearing last year, the message that these computer makers were trying to send is that, at least for casual everyday use, that now the web is ready.  Most people are still skeptical, as is shown by how the netbook market has already changed.  The first machines offered you about 2GB of storage, the theory being that you would only install what you needed to get to where you wanted to go and possibly some other small add-ons like an IM client.   Now most machines come with at least 100 GB of storage (because even if you want to live in the cloud, there are just some times unless you have the money to have an aircard from a wireless carrier installed, you will need SOME stuff to work when you are not connected).  

I am going to take my Asus eeePC, and for my personal life and work test out this theory and see if and how well I can live life in the cloud.  At least initially, my only offline access will be provided through Google Gears.  So I will use GMail for mail (which I had been mostly doing anyway) and importing the mail from my other accounts rather than turning to Microsoft Outlook.  I will start out with Google Docs (since it can use Gears as well) for all my documents, spreadsheets, etc.  Though I will test out some of the other online document creation tools as well.  Meebo will serve as my IM client.  Photoshop Express or Aviary will become my image editors, and well… I think you get the idea.  No local applications installed.  If I really start missing interacting with a desktop, I will give DesktopTwo a whirl again (but I wasn’t that thrilled with it the first time around).

So wish me luck, this is as close to “roughing it” as I care to get these days.  I will report back on how these and any other living in the cloud apps work. If you have suggestions of products or sites you think I should try out, then by all means let me know.

Oh, everybody and their brother will dissect this Superbowl game a million different ways.  While it was certainly an entertaining and exciting game, I just had no emotional interest in the game.  (IF there was a way for Warner and  Roethlisberger to both lose, then perhaps I would have had something to root for.)  No, rather I am taking a look at what was true interest… the commercials.

The Superbowl is sadly (I think) the one time that advertisers (normally) pull out all the stops to try and make an impression or kick off a new ad campaign, or to try and create some buzz for themselves.  Some, like the Budweiser Frogs (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cS5ZB1gBTEk)  become so popular, they become industries unto themselves, or like the Budweier “Wassaup” commercial (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=L38wthA4Ld0) forever change us, as there are still people that yell “Wassup” though I suspect some of them have no idea why.   This year, I thought was the most pathetic set of commercials since the onslaught of bad “DotCom” commercials, like this idiotic one from E*trade (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BnQMq5wtZcg).

So what were some of the hits and misses in the house of the Triple Venti Latte?

The best of the mediocre bunch

I liked the Coke Zero ad.  Though, I thought it would have been better if Coke had dusted off the original commercial with Mean Joe Greene (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Lc0izCGKxP8) earlier in the game.  I can’t help but wonder how many people didn’t get the reference and thus probably found that commercial far less entertaining.

The 3-D ads were popular with LatteGirl, who originally had no interest in seeming Monsters vs. Aliens.  I thought the Sobe commercial was the best of the first half, but that was not a tough hurdle this year.  That is not to say it was a good ad, it certainly didn’t inspire me to drink Sobe products, but it was interesting.  Overall, and probably not suprisingly, it was very difficult for these ads to live up to their hype.

I liked the Pedigree ad for adopting dogs.  But unless I read this a year from now, I doubt I will remember it.

The Alec Baldwin ad was good for Hulu, though again in better years it would have rated as forgettable, this year however, it had little competition.

The same is true for 2 the Bud commercials.  The Clydesdale “fetching” a tree, and the one going across the world (to the tune of “Ain’t no mountain high enough”) held my attention and even got a snicker.

Almost

There were a couple of ads that could have been winners.  The ads were amusing, but I can’t now remember the brands or products they were selling, so considering that, was it worth it?

Mr. & Mrs. Potato Head had me laughing, the wife glaring and LatteGirl trying to decipher why we had such different takes on the commercial.  But what were they selling?  I honestly can’t remember.

The talking flowers in the box was amusing and made a nice point about getting the message across properly, but I can’t remember which flower service it was hawking.

The bombs were numerous.

GoDaddy, like the BudBowl (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hR3iiiBsxYE),  they had an angle once… years ago, but have grown so boring and predictable, they are almost painful to watch.  Side note, does Danica Patrick expect anybody to take her seriously any more?  

Personally, I thought the absolute worst was the “PepSuba” ad from Pepsi.  To me, this might as well have just been an ad for Coke.  What was the message here, that Pepsi drinkers are too stupid to realize they should stop drinking their soda long enough to not die in an explosion?  There is a longer version supposedly available online, but I am not inclined to go find it.

A genius can’t buy a car without cars.com.  The message here?  I guess is stop spending so much time online and get some social skills, which of course is counter-productive to a dot.com.

I know some people liked it (mostly seemingly for the desire to punch a Koala), but the careerbuilder.com commerical reminds me why I love my Tivo so much.  This was just painful to watch after several iterations.  I think they could have had a bigger “hit” if they stuck to punching the Koala.  

I could go on, but it only gets worse from here.  So tell me… what did you think were the big hits (and misses) of this years Superbowl ads?

Well, as I mentioned last week (has it really been a week already?  I have go to find a way to find more blogging time), LatteGirl went off to Lake Placid to compete in the ISI Lake Placid Championships.  Without trying to sound to braggy (but how could I not be at least a little braggy), she came home with 3 gold medals and a silver in the four events she entered.

Obviously, she was also thrilled.  But besides being tired (on the last day they went snow tubing before a 5-1/2 hour ride home), there was a certain… I don’t know what to call it, really… listless undertone to her mood.  What could make a child who just did so well in her competition, had fun swimming (she has continued her streak of swimming in every hotel pool she has ever had the opportunity to swim in… be it frozen for ice, or warm for swimming, apparently you just can’t keep my child away from water).  So what could this reservation in her jubilation be?  She denied it at first, so I didn’t push the issue.

The following morning, I inquired again, and I found out the problem.  It seems there was another girl that is from her skate club that was signed up and in all the save events (and same “flight” as they call it), as LatteGirl… meaning they were competing head to head in each of the 4 events along with other girls from other skate clubs.  As I pointed out earlier, LatteGirl came home with 3 gold and a silver.  This other girl, whom LatteGirl only knows because they have the same coach, but LatteGirl still considers a “friend” came home with 3 silver and a bronze.  Do you see where this is headed?

Yeah, by the time the trip was over and they were heading home, her friend was no longer speaking to her, and in fact was giving her dirty looks whenever LatteGirl looked in her direction.  This troubled her.  She didn’t like that fact that her friend was mad at her, but couldn’t reconcile what she should have done differently.  She believes you should always do the best you can, and besides, this competion, the judges just decide on a winner… there is no scoreboard of points to look at to judge a “level”  So she really couldn’t throw one of the events if she wanted to (there was no way that was going to happen, she is every bit as competitive as I am, and letting up is just not her style), and besides just because she may have thrown an event doesn’t mean that the judges might not have given the medal to somebody else anyway.

It is a shame.  I have always tried to instill good sportsmanship in Lattegirl, but it seems to me that this girl’s parents didn’t bother to teach her good manners or how to be a good sport.) I tried to reassure her that eventually this little girl would probably move on and eventually forget all about coming in behind LatteGirl at every event this time, and who knows, at the next competion she may be the one that comes out on top.

["Not a chance," she says, "next time I will be even better." ]

Yup she is my child alright

I am sure some people will be getting sick of these posts, but I still get quite excited when LatteGirl has these ice skating events.  Every event (so far) is bigger and more special than the last.  I guess I will stick on this course for about a year (so let me apologize in advance), and then once these get into re-runs, it won’t be such a big deal.

But I feel bad that I cannot attend this one.  LatteGirl and TheWife have headed off on their own o Lake Placid.  This is not really all that much different than the event she went to in Yonkers.  Except it is bigger, with far more competitors from all over the country.  

So they are there, and I am here.  I will be missing today’s competition due to firewall issues, but tomorrow I will get to watch her skate via Webcast (Yes, this event has a webcast that they sell tickets to).  So, at least I will get to see it even if I can’t be there in person, but I still really wish I could have made the trip.  Of course somebody has to pay for all these excursions… so I will try to enjoy it as best I can via the Webcast.

There are definitely some benefits to leaving me behind.  I have been such the nervous one since she started competing.  She has managed to be as cool as can be.  So far, she has manged to avoid picking up my nervousness, but if I was around, it would probably only be a matter of time until she decided that if I was so nervous, that perhaps she SHOULD be, and I don’t want that to happen.

Of course, I can try and console my “poor me” factor (and after the expense of this trip, I really mean POOR me), with the fact that I have the house to myself for a day and half (they come home on Sunday).  Well, only me and the dogs, and fortunately they are not talking.  (Oh, please lord don’t turn this into a Bush’s baked beans commercial on me).  So perhaps I will drown my “sorrows” by stopping for a micro-brew or six, order in  some sort of greasy foodthing in and pretend like this was my plan all along and this is how I really wanted it to be.  Yeah, that sounds good.  And besides, I will see her tomorrow… even if it is on a webcast.

I am nothing but predictable… some call it lame, but I will stick with “predictable.”

For some time now (I guess far too long a time now), I have used the same response when told about a plan that is too good to be true, or just sounds completely unbelieveable. That is to say something along the lines of, “Off the freeway, through the window, off the floor, nothin’ but net.”

It harkens back to a(n) (old) McDonald’s commercial with Larry Bird and Michael Jordan. I said that at a meeting with my staff, and all I got were some dumbfounded looks. I realized that these kids had no idea what the hell I was talking about… which was enough to make me feel old.

But as I explained the commercial, saying it starred Larry Bird and Michael Jordan, the response I got back just killed me. “Who’s Larry Byrd?” At that point, I left the meeting and placed an order for my plot at the mausoleum.

OK, gratuitous inflamatory headline now out of the way, a little bit of reality.  I am venturing to guess that anybody that reads this blog also already reads This Full House, but just in case there is one that doesn’t…

You know that little Campaign to Blog Out Hunger that 100+ New Jersey Bloggers participated in a little more than a week ago?  Well, Liz decided to take it one step further, and well go ask some big, huge Super Market Chain to help.  And you know what?  They responded.  Stop & Shop will donate $1 for every comment on this post.

So…. why are you still here?  Go comments on that post alredy will ya.  Go tell Stop & Shop how cool they are.  Tell Liz while you’re at it too (ya’ see sometimes she forgets because…well… because she has That Full House to take care of and all), or just wish everybody Happy Holidays.

Are you still here?  Oh… you commented already.  Well then in that case thank YOU!

My guess is everybody else in the world was already aware of this, but I just found out that I finally got something I wanted this year for Xmas.  And not a moment too soon as far as I am concerned, Bratz dolls are no more.  

Now I have to admit, this has been a troublesome issue for me.  On the one hand, I hated those little trampy dolls.  On the other hand, as I have had discussions with other people, people that seem to have a hatred almost as deep for Barbie, it got me thinking.  At first I never understood how anybody could allow their daugher to own these little tramps.  But, when I was on the other side of the argument with people that made the same or similar arguments against Barbie,  I realized how it really came down to a level of threshholds. (Though you will never convince me that Barbie, which at least has “careers” and the such are as bad as these Bratz that instill no values what-so-ever, but again, purely a point of view).

Lately, it has gotten a bit tougher with LatteGirl as well.  She couldn’t uderstand our ban on the dolls, and while she accepted that she wasn’t allowed to have them, she was quick to point out that other friends of hers do have them, and that they “aren’t so bad,” and how disappointed she was that she could not have them.

I tried to counter with High School Musical figures, Kim Possible dolls (she can do anything), and even went the route of American Girl Dolls.  While she likes all of them, she still was a bit bent on this issue.  Now (well at least once this Xmas passes), the issue will be no more, and I must admit I am quite happy about it.

To be sure these are trying times for all but the most affluent of people, as concerns about the economy, about jobs, about paying our bills, and other such concerns fill our minds.  It is natural if not instinctive that we go into a sort of preservation mode.  We cut out unnecessary expenses, we buy less or less expensive where we can.  We sort of go into our own little bunker and try to avoid looking at the scary world out there.  

Unfortunately as our economy has taught us playing ostrich, that is burying our heads in the sand and hoping it doesn’t affect us is not a viable solution.  I am not going to go into statistics and numbers.  They are out there for anybody to find, and I am sure that at least several of the more than a hundred bloggers that have chosen to participate in this campaign will cite them.  Instead, I want you to think about it from a self-preservation mode.  As a way of “saving for a rainy day.”  As a way of hedging your bets against the worst.  If you can’t think of it any other way, think of it as an insurance policy against total disaster.

Fortunately, if you are reading this blog, you have rarely if ever had to look and make a decision like, do I heat my home, or feed my family?  More times than not, saying we have “nothing to eat” means, you are so sick of some dinner or food item, that you just don’t want to have to consider eating what you have on hand.  But what if the worst were to happen.  Sudden job loss, family illness, something that just wiped you out, and all of the sudden the cuppoards are actually bare.  Where can you turn?

Unfortunately, at this time situations like this are happening more than ever before.  The demands on the food banks are greater than any time in most people’s memories.  But at the same time, with people being more careful with their money, less are donating, leaving the shelves of places like the Community Food Bank of New Jersey desperate for items needed to provide relief to those in need.  What if you suddenly found yourself on the other side?  What if there were no places like this left to help?  As this title says, this is a bank we simply cannot let fail!  This is why I say, if nothing else, think of it as you would an insurnace policy, something that you “pay” into hoping that you will never need it.

So how can you buy into this insurance policy?

1. Make a monetary contribution: Visit http://www.njfoodbank.org/.
2. Donate food: Drop off a bag of food at your local food pantry.
3. Organize a food drive: Just call 908-355-FOOD, and they will provide you with guidance.
4. Help “Check Out Hunger:” Look for the “Check Out Hunger” coupons at your local supermarket and donate. 

Simply put, no donation is “too small.”  Every little bit can help… a lot.  You can check out SEFAN for your closest location to make a donation.   This is often the time of year when thanks to the spirit of giving and the holidays, people normally remember those less fortunate, and the shelves of food banks are typically well stocked.  But like Old Mother Hubbard, the foodbanks are finding the cuppoards bare.  

When deciding when or how much to help, just stop for a moment… and picture this.  Imagine your child, rather than wishing for Wii, or a doll, or some other fun toy, they are just wishing to not have to go to bed hungry.  How much would you want to fulfill that wish?  There are people out there, right now just hoping to make that wish come true.  And you can help.  Please do.

I’d like to thank Deborah from Jersey Bites for helping to organize this, all the other bloggers that have united to help raise awareness, and to you for your anticipated help.  Thank You.

Other participants, in this drive:

1) JerseyBites.com

2) RedBankGreen.com

3) Jersey Girl Cooks

4) Simply Sable

5) John and Lisa are eating in South Jersey

6) Padma’s Kitchen

7) Chefdruck

8) Life Lightly Salted

9) My Italian Grandmother

10) Cook Appeal

11) Crotchety Old Man Yells at Cars

12) Mommy Vents

13) This Full House

14) Paper Bridges

15) Motherhood Avenue

16) The Kamienski Chronicles

17) Down the Shore with Jen

18) Fits and Giggles

19) House Hubbies Home Cooking

20) Nourish Ourselves

21) Partybluprints.com

22) Tommyeats.com

23) Off the broiler

24) Mrs. Mo’s New Jersey Baby

25) IamNotaChef.com

26) SimplyBeer.com

27) HistoryGeek.com

28) Savy Source Newark

29) Momlogic New Jersey

30) SurvivingNJ.com/blog

31) SurvivingNJ.blogspot.com

32) JerseyGirlGuide.com

33) Best of Roxy

34) Citizen Mom.net

35) Lynetteradio.com

36) Jersey Beat

37) Pop Vulture Phil

38) JerseySmarts.com

39) LongBeachIslandSummers.com

40) WildwoodSummers.com

41) Mike Halfacres Blog

42) Somerset08873

43) Family, Friends and Food

44) KateSpot.com

45) NewJerseyMomsBlog.com

46) JCRegister.com

47) New Jersey Real Estate Report

48) Riverviewobserver.com

49) More Monmouth Musings

50) Man of Infirmity

51) Another Delco Guy in South Jersey

52) SweetNicks.com

53) Average Noone

54) Cleary’s Notebook

55) Welcome to my Planet

56) The Center of New Jersey Life

57) Sharon’s Food Blog

58) Morristown, Chatham, Summit, and Madison NJ Real Estate

59) Midtown Direct Real Estate News

60) New Jersey Real Estate

61) BlowUpRadio.com

62) LazlosDen.com

63) The Ridgewood Blog

64) Book a Week with Jen

65) Banannie

66) Cartoongoddess.com

67) Matawan Advocate

68) Take Back the Kitchen

69) The Joy of Toast

70) Route 55

71) Montclair Kids.com

72) SaveJersey

73) Stompbox

74) Joe the Blogger

75) Environmental Republican

76) Stacey Snacks

77) Subversive Garden

78) New Jersey Pathfinder

79) Cooking With Friends Blog

80) Triple Venti

81) Read All About It

82) Rich Lee on Media

83) Likelihood of Success

84) Cape Cuisine

85) The Business At Hand

86) NewJerseyTaxRevolution

87) Figmentations

88) MiddletownMike

89) Caviar and Codfish

90) A Day in the Life

91) Mack’s Journey Through Life

92) Alice’s Restaurant

93) Tiger Hawk

94)Politics Patrol, The Bob Ingle Blog

95) The Food Chain

96) Henson’s Hell

97) Cranbury Conservative

98) Baristanet

99) New Jersey: Politics Unusual

100) Jersey Shore Blog

101) Plainfield Today

102) Beacon Bulletin

103) Journal Square Jersey City 07306

Normally I wouldn’t bother with a movie a month old since most will have already seen it that are considering it.  But looking over the reviews for this movie, I felt I was a bit misled, so I figured it would be worth adding a review, so I could warn parents like myself that normally enjoy animated movies such as this.

Granted, Madagascar: Escape 2 Africa got mixed reviews, but by and large any sequel usually gets this sort of mixed reception.  So, I took note of the number of people that said how it was actually better than the original (about the best praise you can give in my opinion) in the positive reviews and thought, OK it can’t be too terrible, since those that like it praised it far more than Ice Age: The Meltdown, which again wasn’t a real winner, but I thought was an OK sequel.

So when my daughter decided she wanted to see this, and to “save” Bolt for another week, I didn’t put up too much of a fight, and for the first 10 minutes of the movie, it seemed like it was an OK decision.  The flashback sequence, and the pseudo-recap of the first movie that gets you “up to date” was entertaining.  Unfortunately the film went downhill from there.  Like Ice Age: The Meltdown, Madagascar made use of the side characters much more in the sequel.  The penguins were again entertaining, but not enough to carry the movie, the Lemur king just became annoying and overdone, and none of this bodes well with a script that seem too much like something you have already seen before.  Part Nemo, part Lion King, part lots of other films, I kept seeeing bits from other film rather than a story that I could just immerse myself in and enjoy.

But, you will say, this is not a Pixar film and so it has less of an adult worthy script and is really geared more towards the little ones.  To those people I will tell you that about 3/4 of the way through the film, my daughter leaned over to me and asked “How much longer is this?”  And that about says it all.  There was only one other film my daughter has ever had this much disdain for, and that was Bee Movie which she begged her way into leaving half way through.  So was Madagascar better than Bee Movie, or has my daughter just matured a bit and learned a little more patience?  I’m not sure.  But, in the end it really doesn’t matter, because bad, or really awful, it is something that I wouldn’t tell anybody to waste your money on seeing in theaters.  There is nothing that will be lost in the translation to the small screen, so for those with kids that are entertained just by seeing animals run around on the screen, it might be a decent rental or purchase (if you find it on sale), but to spend the time and money (and effort to get to the theater) Madagascar: Escape 2 Africa is not worth it.  There are other films out, and others on the way, this is one that you can miss without feeling bad about it.

I’m sure that anybody reading this has already heard or read about the employee killed by a stampede at Wal-Mart on Black Friday, but I just couldn’t let it go.  It is the one time where I wish life was like CSI, and they could put somebody behind bars for this.  But this is a case where you basically have 2000 guilty parties (the estimated crowd outside the store), and no single person will be held accountable.

If anything, Wal-Mart may get sued for negligence for not having sufficient staffing and/or security, and it will most likely be settled out of court and swept under the rug.  While I do agree that Wal-Mart is guilty in not having proper staffing/security, the real culprits are the animals that were rushing into the store.  The one’s that kept streaming in and stepping over the man down, the ones that complained when the store was closed because of the death, and kept shopping because they felt they were owed it because they were dumb enough to wait on a line at some insane hour to save a few dollars.

I am certainly going to be called judgemental for this next part but, honestly right now I don’t care.  If you are the type of person that is shopping at Wal-Mart (and that includes me), you have no business in this economy buying big ticket items.  Unemployment numbers are on the rise, and at this point, basically nobody is guarateed to surive this downturn as far as jobs is concerned.  So, why exacly are you rushing out for a Flat Screen TV or a PS3 or another big ticket purchase?  I pick on these people first because, well because it is really an unecessary purchase.  If you are on line for smaller purchases at that hour, you are basically just beyond help.  Without those big ticket items, there was and is no reason to be out there at that crazy hour.  Stores have been running amazing sales already, and will by all accounts be offering the same or better as the season goes along thanks to what is expected to be a dismal holiday season for retailers, so what exactly are you rushing out for?

I saw the deals at Wal-Mart, and while some of them are certainly enticing, I didn’t see anything that was worth actually busting down the door and racing into the store in order to get.  These people were just animals, feeding on each other and built into a frenzy.  And if I had my way, each and every one of them would be held accountable.  Happy Freakin’ Holidays you nut jobs, hope you are proud of yourselves.

This is not intended to be in any way partisan or political (otherwise I would throw it over on The Daft Democrat), but since it affects our children, it is worth noting here.  The FDA has shown all to much a willingness to throw the health and safety of our food supply under the proverbial bus in efforts to protect businesses and “assure” the public there is “no risk” in places that the amount of risk is actually indeteriminable or worse.

I have covered rGBH/rBST (lots of times) as well as Food Cloning, in the past so I won’t rehash that and other stories like it.   When you consider that of the 50,845 children affected by this in China over 1000 babies are still in the hospital from melamine poisoning (and 4 have died), it was a GOOD thing that the FDA decided to start testing infant formula here.  It is not a good thing howver, that after finding melamine in at least one baby formula product, tries to sweep it under the rug as “no big deal.”   As some consumer advocates have already pointed out:

The FDA’s earlier determination that 250 ppb of melamine was a trace amount was intended for foods other than infant formula, said Sonya Lunder, a senior analyst with the Environmental Working Group.

“This is out of step with what the FDA said earlier,” she told Reuters.

 

This is because formula is the sole source of nutrition at that age, so that “trace” amount is as a percentage a much higher part of an infants intake.  Also, what seems to be missing from the story is that, melamine is often added to falsely show higher protein counts in product, so that means there is actually not as much protein as the product(s) claim.  And, as sciencebase notes:

There is no reason to imagine that those unscrupulous enough to add a toxic compound to baby formula milk would worry about contaminants, such as cyanuric acid, that might be found in the raw material. Indeed, even if melamine toxicity were not an issue and truly was an inert substance added to spike the protein readings in quality control tests, then any one of the impurities associated with rough melamine manufacture may be a major cause for concern.

I understand the FDA not wanting to start a nationwide panic, but there is nothing that is insignificant about this issue.  We don’t really need to wait until babies die here from melamine poisoning before we do something about it, do we?  The FDA needs to be on the side of the consumer, not protecting businesses.

As Citigroup is bailed out with protection of up to $308 billion dollars in troubled assets, I can’t help but wonder, am I the only freakin’ loan that Citigroup has that is paying his mortgage on time?  I mean if you figure the average mortgage is $184,282 that means Citigroup alone has more than 1.6 million troubled mortgages?!?

I was none too happy when my mortgage got sold to CIti a little more than a year ago, from a nice friendly small bank to the arrogant behemouth that is Citigroup.  And this only leaves me with the question of whether I want to take the time to find another bank and pay the closing costs just to get away from them.

What is it that is going on in the social media world these days that is making for all the short tempers?

It just seems lately that everybody is ready to fight and/or to be mad at somebody.  Whether it is people getting pissy (on both sides of the equation) about Magpie ads on Twitter, or the 48 scourge of Motrin Moms, it seems to me lately that everybody is ready to… brawl over… something… anything.

Could it be post election  blues, where after 21 months of arguing policy and personnel, and G. Gordon Liddy vs Bill Ayers, and Palin vs. Palin, and McCain vs Obama, that we just need something to fill the void?  Is it the economy, season blues?, holiday stress?

I don’t know, but I am seriously considering going into hiding until after Xmas… but that would most likely only make me one of the cranky people.

It seems like only yesterday that I was saying it wasn’t time to buy Blu-Ray yet (it was actually March).  And to be honest, for me, nothing has changed yet.  Yes, they are starting to put more of a push on the Blu-Ray market, and prices on some players are finally coming down.

But… this is definitely a case of buyer beware.  There was recently a deal on woot and rumblings and leaks about about cheap Blu-Ray players being one of the big doorbuster deals that will be coming the day after Thanksgiving.  As with all things too good to be true, there is a catch.  Most (if not all) of these players are going to be BLu-Ray 1.1 players.  What does that mean?  It means if you see a disk with BDLive… you can’t use that feature.  The newest features are not available on 1.1, and unlike the 2.0 spec, the 1.1 is NOT upgradeable via firmware.  So, while you may be getting the “latest technology” you will be getting one that is hobbled by an older specification, and you won’t get all the features being offered on the new Blu-Ray discs.

So, think twice before you make that jump.

Cathy McCaughan of Domestic Psychology showed that she wasn’t afraid to be seen palling around with a Socialist like me that wants to spread the wealth and pass on the copy of Baby Blues I won from the unflappable Liz over at This Full House.  So she threw her comment into the ring for this contest, and came up the winner.

Congrats Cathy.

It was a gold medal weekend around here, all around, though some may not exactly see it that way. For the most part, plans for my birthday on Saturday were altered and adjusted to fit in with skating rehearsals and an early bed time to ensure everybody was well rested and ready to head out skating early on Sunday.

I did take some time to walk over to city hall, where I met two couples that were camped out all day in support of the No On 8 protests.  The five of us didn’t make for much of a protest, but it was better (I think) than nobody showing up at all, and I thought the whole banding together on a single day across the country was a great idea, and pulled off well nationwide (even if not in my hometown).  Being the only one (allowed to be) married out of the group they thanked me for “representing” though I felt quite disappointed that I was the only one there to hold that position, and especially since I only stayed an hour or so to show my support.  But, as much as I would have like to have stayed around longer, I had my own chores, and birthday dinner to cook.  (OK, I only had to cook part of it, and that was only because TheWife had to take LatteGirl to her practice).

I am sure many who follow me on Twitter probably tuned out as I made such a big deal over my daughter’s first figure skating competition… not to mention her winning it.  Granted, winning at this level is not a big deal.  Virtually all kids walk away with some sort of “award” for their participation.  But I was very proud of her, and if I am over the top silly about it, well… honestly I don’t care, because it meant a lot to her, and by extension to me as well.  My primary concern is that she is happy, and that she had fun.  At the same time, she has put so much work into this as I mentioned when I admitted when I said how nervous I was for her.

She put other thing aside, passed up or gave up other activities to dedicate herself to this.  Even over the past couple of days, it showed.  She came down with a bit of a cold, and fought through the cold and some rough rehersals, and again passed up on other things to “get myself better” before the event.  Since I do not frequently get to see her practice, I was actually amazed at how far along she had come in just the month or so since I got to see her practice last.

And while I was beaming with pride as I watched her skate, and again when she was announced as the winner, it wasn’t the proudest I was of her on this particular day.  During her “event” (there many “events” with up to 4 girls in each “event”), one of the four girls fell during her routine (side note:  I was really amazed at how few falls overall there were.  I expected a lot more spills than actually happened).  Apparently (according to her coach, parents are now allowed in staging area during the event) LatteGirl was cheering the girl to get up and go on, and that “she could do it” and not to worry about it, and even gave the girl a hug and told her she was fine when she came off the ice.  Keep in mind, this is not somebody she is friends with, or has even seen in her own rink, it is just another little girl who was “going to be sad,” and that is all she was worried about.  In many sports kids (and their parents) forget that this is supposed to be fun and not cut throat (just how cut throat people are in figure skating, is a post for another day), and worry about winning above everything else.

So, in the end, I had a great birthday dinner, made some new friends, and got to watch my daughter in her first competition (which as a bonus she also happened to win).  For me, it was a gold medal weekend all around.

Recently, I was lucky enough to win a contest over at This Full House (thanks Liz), and I scored a copy of the X-treme Parenting edition of Baby Blues.  Being the bleeding heart liberal that I am, rather than put in on my bookshelf (yes, I already read it, thus the Title), I want to give somebody else the chance to have it.  Yes, I am showing my true socialist colors, and am going to spread the wealth around pass this on to somebody else that would like to read it.  Just comment on this post by 11:59pm on Sunday (Novemer 16th), and I will randomly pick somebody to pass the book along to.

Baby Blues

*** Also, don’t forget, BusyMom and I are giving away a Joby Gorillapod over at Parentography (that one ends November 15th), so stop on over there for a chance to win that as well.  ***

Granted, there are plenty of things to waste you time on, no matter where in “the tubes” you are, but I just ran across a new one that, while yes it is probabaly inefficient, and a waste of time, is still quite cool.  It is the new (to me) Amazon Windowshop.

Probabaly the best way to think about Amazon Windowshop is wandering around aimlessly through a bookstore/music store and just looking at whatever happens to catch your eye.  All without the requisite trip down to the mall.

The flash based site, is responsive (assuming you have a decent broadband provider) and has clips/trailers for the movies, sound samples from the CDs and even reads you the dust cover from books. It is a fun way to discover something new, when you don’t already know exactly what you are looking for, and just want something that grabs your interest.

While this came off sounding like an advertisement, I assure you it is not.  It is just cool.

Soaring

Nervous? Who me? Damn right I am.  A week away from her first competition, she is excited… but me, I am a total bundle of nerves.  But I can’t tell her.  Not so much about the competition itself.  There will be plenty of those in the future (I think), but still… this has become a big deal.

LatteGirl likes to do a lot of things.  Dancing, soccer, gymnastics, and so on.  But few hold more than entertainment value.  When she took up skating last year and decided she wanted to take lessons, I didn’t think much of it. Just another childhood activity, though one I have always enjoyed, and we always encourage her to try new things.  But this one was different.

She has really taken to the ice and skating.  Other than dancing, which she kept up, everything else has fallen to the wayside for this.  When her instructor said she was good enough to start trying competitions, LatteGirl was informed that some things would have to give, because the commitment was far greater.  She would have to go from 1 to 3 (sometimes 4) days a week of skating.  That meant no more gymnastics, no more soccer.  She agreed.  Her dedication level to figure skating far exceeds anything else she has done (except for school where she views her test as Perfect and Not perfect and nothing in between).  She is incredibly hard on herself and normally expects nothing but being the best she can be.  And that is why I am nervous.

We have tried to temper her expectations.  Tried to make her understand that no matter how good you are at something, there is always somebody else that is better.  But at the same time, we don’t want to discourage her in any way.  It is a fine line to walk.   I am excited to see her out there competing, and am sure she will be fine.  But, I am worried that she may get frustrated if she doesn’t do as well as she expects.

We are still a week away.  I am sure at some point she will get nervous as well.  While we have managed to get her on a number of different rinks, there are only so many in the area, plus she has to work with where her coaches are, so those rinks are far more familiar.  Next week, we will be traveling to Yonkers.  Her first time on the ice there will be her warm ups.  I suspect it will be then (if not sooner) that her nerves will catch up with mine, but unlike me, she is gets overwhelmed by her emotions quite easily.  I know all this, but still I feel so helpless at this point.  I can be there for her, and I will be.  But other than that, there is nothing I can do to protect her.  I’m proud that she is taking these steps, but at the same time… helpless… and quite nervous.  I guess I will just suck it up and hope for the best.  It is about all I can do.

Update:  I guess what I am trying to say is… all I want it for her to have fun and enjoy the experience.

I am seriously having trouble with the conversion back to Standard Time this year.  It has nothing to do with the clocks, I am not one that stresses over the moving clocks back (or forward).  But the getting out of work (and arriving to work) in the dark is bugging me far more than usual.  I dunno, perhaps my Seasonal Affective Disorder is kicking in early this year.

My one saving grace so far is that it appears Starbucks is getting an early jump on the holidays, and I was able to get my much beloved Gingerbread Latte for the first time of the year.  It is amazing how much a good cup of coffee can improve your morning.  Thanks Starbucks, I needed that.

Before I get started… if you want to read a well thought out and eloquent piece on the subject of Proposition 8 (California, and really by extention also Proposition 2 in Florida), then by all means, go here and read Backpacking Dad’s take.  I most unfortunately find that I am often (and now is probably one of those times) that when something irritates me so, I am passionate, but far less well worded.  (See what I mean?  I have the thoughts… but getting them to sound right… not so much my forte in such situations).  It will not however keep me from expressing said thoughts though.

As suggested by Backpacking Dad’s article, I went to the About Page of Protect Marriage.  I don’t know why.  I guess like a car wreck, sometimes you just need to see just how bad something appears for yourself.  What can I say, I am glad in some ways that I live in NJ, because I would really like to smack somebody in the head right about now.  I mean seriously… People like this still exist and are functioning members of society?

In a way, I just don’t understand how this could possibly pass.  Do women not remember (metophorically of course) not being considered worthy to vote?  Do black people not remember (and how could they not since it is a battle that behind hushed breathes affects to some degree even our current Presidential election) how they had to fight to not be considered 3/5 of a white person?  Is it all that long ago that people forgot that a mixed marriage wouldn’t even be allowed in some churches?

Now, I realize that even though many of these prejudices have been “technically” overcome, that there are still those that believe women shouldn’t vote, that won’t hire or just plain people because of the color of their skin, and look down at mixed marriages.  I will even give some of them credit, because while they may certainly be sexist or racist… some of them are so stuck in their beliefs that they are proud of it.  They readily admit it.

But not the homophobes behind “protecting marriage.”  They try and cover up their discrimination in the most pathetic of ways.  They want to “protect the children.”  Yup, they want to protect the children from knowing that two men or two women can love each other.  Because, “that kind” of love is “evil.”  They want to hide the fact that gay people exist.  Why?  So they can continue to try and keep it underground.  They want people ashamed to be gay, so that they have no way of knowing that they are not alone.  They want to be free to discriminate agaist gay people at will.  They resent being (in their own words), “forced to tolerate gay lifestyles.”  Yup, that is right.  They have to be forced to tolerate it… because they are intolerant people looking to write discrimination directly into their state Constitutions.

Ladies (and gentlemen), could you imagine repealing the 19th Ammendment?  Heck, Ann Coulter thinks that is a good idea.  Find a few people that don’t want to have to “tolerate” African-Americans, and they can get the Civil Rights Act tossed.  Heck, find  a few segregationists together and who knows, maybe they could just repeal the 13th Ammendment and bring slavery back.  Sounds pretty stupid doesn’t it?  Then why the heck doesn’t it sound stupid to be trying to enact a law that would freely allow discrimination agaist somebody being gay?

Now, understand something, this isn’t only about the homophobes, and wing-nuts that try and make this a religious battle.  No, there is a quiet subversion from the corporate world here as well.  The lack of status in a gay relationships allows discrimination in healthcare, in benefits to employees, and more.  A business doesn’t have to cover a gay employees family with benefits, because it is “not recognized.”  Death benefits don’t have to be paid out, or pensions don’t have to be continued to the surviving spouse, because they don’t recognize a gay spouse.

But regardless of the reason for their agenda, what those voting yes on 8 are doing one thing… discriminating.  Something we should be long past in this country but aren’t.  These are hateful people that don’t want to have to “forced to tolerate” others, and who knows, these same people may wish to discriminate against you someday, because you do, say or just are something that they don’t want to have to “tolerate” any longer.

There isn’t a well reasoned excuse to support this.  Any well thought reasonable person can not come up with any valid reason to do anything but Say NO on Proposition 8 in California, Say NO on Proposition 2 in Florida.  For those that aren’t DIRECTLY affected (such as me), just understand that these games if sucessful in California and Florida will start popping up in your area also as other hateful people decide to take up the mantel.  So this needs to be beaten, and in a resounding way so that others don’t decide to try their luck with similar pieces of discrimination in their states.  So, if you don’t have a vote, please… encourage those that you may know that do… to do the right thing.  Vote NO to discrimination.

In 1994, several month before TheWife and I are to be married, we got a frightening call.  My mother was rushed to the hospital, she was completely incoherent.

The initial situation turned out to be that she had gone into insulin shock.  Diabetic?  Test results said no.  As it turned out she was diagnosed with Islet Cell Carcinoma, a rare form of cancer.

At the time we didn’t know if she was going to make it to see our Wedding Day.  She did, and has been battling cancer ever since.  Some 14 years later, numerous operations, and 2-1/2 years of chemotherapy she is still with us.

I think the fact that we didn’t think she would see 70 years old, only made it more special when my sister and I were able to suprise Mom last week with an 80th birthday party.

The party had to be a surprise, because my mom is the type of person that would never allow us to throw a party in her honor.  As a matter of fact, much like my father, who I did not find out many things about until just before he passed away, there were some things I found out about mom as my sister and I snuck around getting ready for the party, like my mom used to hand make dolls and was presented an award in a doll making contest by Ed Sullivan.

Not that any of this is imporant, because above all, what she has been is a great person, and an even better mom, and I am just happy to have had this opportunity to celebrate this milestone with her.  I love you mom.

Despite it being Halloween and all, I thought it would be a good time to get the cobwebs off of this blog and get at it again.  I am using NaBloPoMo to hopefully assist in kicking my rear into gear.  

Yes, I realize that it doesn’t start until tomorrow, but nothing wrong with getting a head start is there?  Besides I was tagged with a Meme by Liz at This Full House.  Actually I’m not sure if I got “tagged” so much as I was given a “Lighten Up Francis” kick in the head.  And it is true I guess, with elections, a promotion at work with new responsibilities, and such I have been way too serious lately.  So Liz took it upon herself to lighten me up with a puking pumkin in her You’ve Been Ghosted Meme.

So, it has been a while since I have annoyed anybody with a Meme (granted Liz is one of those peope I am usually annoying), so I thought it was time to step up and do this one. 

The rules are easy:

(1)  It’s your turn to “ghost” three other bloggers.

(2)  Stop by their blogs and leave a comment on their latest post saying, “You’ve Just Been Ghosted — Come Over and Grab A Puking Pumpkin!”

(3)  Copy and paste the puking pumpkin somewhere on your blog (either in a post or on your sidebar, perhaps) so that everyone can see that you have been “ghosted” and will NOT “ghost” you again.  This will also let you know who you can “ghost.”

(4)  Feel free to link to this post (or a post of your own) for directions, grab the puking pumpkin and go “ghost” 3 bloggers on your sidebar (preferably, somewhere you haven’t commented in a while, or a blog you’ve NEVER commented on before and/or new to the blogosphere) and dont’ be afraid to share some linky love.
 

And it is that linkly love that makes me like to do these themes.  I read some really awesome blogs, and it is only right (I think) that I acknowledge just how cool you people are (though I also try and figure just who might also participate since I know some of you won’t).

Anyway, three blogers that I bestow my “ghosting” and linky love upon this time would be:

Mitch McDad – Because I still owe him a meme (which I promise I will get to soon), and because he can be honest and cool, and make it look easy.

BusyMom – Because she is my partner on the new Parentography Podcast, and because I swear if I tag her enough times, she will actually do one… someday.

CynicalDad - Because like me, he is starting in on NaMoPoMo, and this will give him one day’s easy post, so I think he just might.  Also he is the only other Panthers fan I know, so I have to give him a due shout out.

Well, now back to your regular Halloween activities… oh, and Happy Halloween (or Blessed Sahmain for those of that persuasion).

Much has been said about the $700 billion dollar bailout package (I don’t need to link to that right? I mean everybody knows about it who is paying attention), but in the midst of this, a little backstory is developing over Wachovia.  It is said that Wachovia faced a “silent run” on the bank, and with Wachovia in the news, and the failure of Washington Mutual, I guess it makes sense that the FDIC moved to act quickly to resolve the situation, and thus brokered the deal that the banking operations would be sold to Citibank.

In that deal however was some agreements that were for the most part overlooked, or at least not highly scrutinized, such as (emphasis added):

In agreeing to purchase Wachovia’s bread-and-butter banking business, including its infamous $120 billion in troubled and so-called option-ARM mortgages, Citigroup will also in essence give the FDIC $12 billion in preferred shares to guarantee that Citi will not face more than $42 billion in losses related to Wachovia’s troubled businesses.

So, the FDIC in what it seems to me is a conflict of interest (I am of course not a lawyer), would become shareholders in Citibank, and would pay off losses from the loan portfolio for anything over $42 billion.  This means the FDIC is potentially on the hook for a boatload of money.  So, when Wells Fargo came along and came up with a deal for the entire operation of Wachovia that put zero FDIC money at risk, the FDIC should have been thrilled (on would think), but this was not the case.

I don’t know if it is the allure of getting a $12 billion stock “payment” to insure the portfolio, but suprisingly instead of being happy that a deal was done that didn’t require the FDIC to bail out any money, instead the FDIC announces that it still is backing the Citi-Wachovia deal.  Citi of course is livid, and is taking their case to court.  This doesn’t surprise me, and it all but solidifies in my mind what a deal Citi believes it is getting here.

The FDIC should not be involved in this any longer, to this extent.  If Citi wants to take over Wachovia, it should now step up to the plate on its own, and make an offer that is better than the one Wells Fargo has put on the table, and without any guarantees from the government.  There is obviously no reason for the government to help Citi make this acquisition if there is another institution out there willing to do it without FDIC help.  Period.  Anything else really is corporate welfare on behalf of Citi.

Yesterday began National Breast Cancer Awareness Month.  Certainly a worthwhile endevour, make no mistake about it.  But I have a question.  Where is the line between “raising awareness” and “exploiting for corporate gain”?

Go, to any supermarket, clothing store, just about anywhere now and you see things draped out in pink.  Canon is offering a special awareness pink camera and printer.  Sales are not tied to a donation, but at least they have commited a donation of $150,000 to cancer research.  Yoplait, makes you collect yogurt tops to get them to make a donation, of ten cents per lid.  Campbell’s soup is changing its label to pink and will donate up to $250,000 (or about 3.5 cents per can sold).  While some of these seem laudable on the surface, it surely is a boom to the companies in increased sales as well.  As a matter of fact in a ABC News story almost two years ago, they pointed out that, the increase in sales and windfall profits dwarved the nominal contributions these companies make.

Some of the programs, as pointed out by Think Before You Pink, are outright hypocritical.  Companies like Yoplait and Hershey’s both refuse to ensure their milk is rBGH free, yet there are concerns that the bovine hormone can cause a myriad of health problems including breast cancer.  Estee Lauder is selling its Pink Ribbon cosmetics, but refuses to sign the Compact for Safe Cosmetics, to ensure their products don’t contain chemicals that are known or suspected to be linked to breast cancer.

Then of course there is the plain outright exploitation.  Go to Target.com and search for Breast Cancer Awareness, and you will find over 60 products available meant to “raise awareness.”  With these products, you have no way of knowing how much (if anything) is being given to cancer awareness, or is just a profit center for these companies.

It seems to me that many of these companies are playing on the fear of breast cancer for their own profits.  If you want to make a difference and help fund research.  Don’t buy yogurt and eat it 3 times a day for a month, only to raise $9.30.  Just write a check to your favorite charity or organization.  You’ll save some money, and still be doing something to help the cause.

I know “socialized” medicine is a taboo subject, especially at election time. but if that is what it is going to take in order to fix the healthcare problems in this country then so be it.  It seems that the capitalist approach does not work when it comes to medicine, and something needs to be done, because while these behemouth corporations, play their games, people are hurt and dying while they are playing them.

I know much of this I have covered in the past… stupid things like, Fat Prejudice in Healthcare (something I have encountered personally in recent events but that is for another post) not to mention things like health insurance companies that take so long to approve a proceedure that the person dies by the time they finally approve it.  People collapse and are left to die on Emergency Room floors.

But as some people who follow me on Twitter saw last night, my new personal fight on this issue is with MEDCO.  Medco is another giant corporation.  They are a “pharmacy benefit management” company.  In more basic user terms, they are the mail order presription filling company that covers (according to their own information) 1 in 5 Americans.

I have had problems with Medco before,  back when I was taking medication for my ADD.  The drugs are considered a controlled substance in New Jersey and you cannot distribute more than a 30 day supply.  But Medco still insisted that I purchase from them otherwise it would not be covered.    However they wouldn’t accept a prescription that had a refill number attached to it, so I had to send a new and unique script every 30 days.  If it hit their office a day early, they would decline it because 30 days had not passed yet, and this meant a lapse in medication for me lasting anywhere from 2 to 5 days (depending on how weekends landed in the cycle).  But this is old news now, and not my issue.

No, my issue is that after 3+ years that Medco has been covering my mom’s prescriptions, they have suddenly decided that because the drug is “off script.”  Since being diagnosed in 1994 with Islet Cell Carcinoma, my mother endured 8 surgeries before the surgeon finally said that she was no longer a candidate for surgery.  She was presribed a chemotherapy program that proved suprisingly successful.  For a cancer that was growing at an incredible rate previously, it seemed to come to a stop when she began.  It didn’t (and doesn’t) actually shrink the tumors as would be the normal hope, but it has suspended their continued growth… for like I said more than 2 years.  But now some clerk has decided that despite the results, and this being the course of action decided by her doctors, this person has decided that it is not the “right usage”

Now, I’m sorry, if my mom wanted some recreational drug to use, she certainly wouldn’t be taking Temodar and Xeloda.  Yes, it would be nice if there was something that was designed specifically for her type of cancer, but unfortunately since it is so rare, the chances of putting together a clinical study to get FDA approval is at best remote.

I really don’t like this.  Not at all.  Now, we will fight this, the paperwork has already gone in to appeal the decision, and letters have been filed by her doctors.  But just how long will this process take?  We were “offered” the opportunity to buy the medication directly… at $4800 for  a 12 day supply (which covers 1 month).  Gee how nice of them.  But the drug is covered.  So if it is OK to SELL the drug to us for her to use even though it is off label, then why aren’t they giving it to us covered?  If they want to complain about how much it costs, they can certainly take up the fight with the pharmaceutical companies, and I would be happy to join that fight as well, because I certainly find it hard to accept $400/dose to be a “fair margin.”

The fight with the pharmaceutical companies will have to wait though, because I can’t worry about that until I know Medco is filling the scripts they should be filling, instead of trying to act like a doctor, or a god, that can just decide from behind some desk who qualifies for what medicine, who lives, and who dies.  It is a deadly game these people are playing and we shouldn’t have to stand for it.

I am not a professional photographer.  Not by any stretch of the imagination, but it is a hobby that has seemingly taken on a life of its own.  Taking me (hopefully) somewhere, someday in the future.  Perhaps the next mountain I climb when I tire of being a programmer.

I still learning, but right now it is a whole lot of fun.  I took over 500 photos during our vacation.  There was a couple that had recently gotten engaged there with us, and I decided to have a little fun, and with any luck give them something to remember this giddy happy times (as engaged people are wont to have at this stage in the relationship).

If you happened to look at a few of the pictures I have posted to Flickr so far from the vacation, you may have seen a little lake that is on the resort.  In the middle of that lake was (I thought) an excellent little island spot (it is connected by a bridge) for a few photos.  So we waited until after dinner until the sun was starting to set so we didn’t get any harsh shadows, and went out to the island for some pictures.

I made no claims that any of the pictures would be any good (though I do have to admit I do like at least a couple of them), and they weren’t getting any other pictures done anyway, so it is not like I tried to steal a job from a real professional, nor replaced a good photographer.  For me it was fun and an experience.  For them, it seemed as if they had fun, and they have a few pictures to remember these days with.  So I may not be a professional photographer yet, but I did get to play one while I was on vacation.

I can’t express how much I needed this years vacation.  Plus, unlike last year, it didn’t rain, I didn’t wind up with a concussion, and I didn’t get sick. It has been a really stressful year, and it is amazing just how much of that tension can be melted away in a week.

For me, it was a week of volleyball, softball, Karaoke, playing with my new camera.  For TheWife, it was lounging around reading and shoe shopping.  For LatteGirl it was making new friends, reconnecting with old friends, spending too much money in the arcade, and lots of swimming.

I thought last year LatteGirl had really spread her wings, but it was nothing compared with this year.  I guess I can thank the game room and her need for quarters, otherwise I am not sure I would have seen her all week (well other than meal time).

I covered how I thought that this was the perfect vacation, when I first found it, so I won’t repeat myself.  (If you didn’t see it then, you can find it here.) The only thing I didn’t cover then was the friends you make.  This was our third year going to Chestnut Grove, and what makes it special is the people.  Not only do I look forward to being there, I look forward to seeing the same faces year after year.  Its the friends you make, even more than the place itself that makes it such a great time.   Most vacations…such as when we went to Disney last year… well, I need a vacation when I return from them.  Not here.

I played a little too hard, drank a little too much, laughed a little too lound, and now I am actually ready to come back and face the world again as I count down to when we do it all again.

This past weekend marked four years since my father passed away.  As is typical (since we are closer) after visiting the masaoleum, my mother and aunt came back to the house for dinner.

LatteGirl was not much in the mood for eating and after querying her to what was wrong, she bemoaned the fact of how much she missed Poppie.  My mom gave her a hug, and while stating that she missed him too, that if LatteGirl wanted to know what Poppie would do or say to just look at me, since I was just like him.

While I don’t completely agree with that assesment, and still don’t believe I can hold a candle to my father, I don’t think there is a better compliment I could ever receive.

I am not good at the small details.  This is a known flaw.  It is also a big part of my ADHD.  It is also, apparently the one thing that can take a great weekend and (apparently) make it all “not count.”

With our Anniversary falling on a Tuesday this year we decided to celebrate over the weekend.  This included, Tickets to see A Chorus Line on Broadway, Dinner at Steve’s Waterside Restaurant with a very nice view of Manhattan’s Skyline.  It was followed up with a trip to replace our aging Zenith Behemouth TV and gigantic (and quite ugly) Entertainment Center with a Flat Screen, and an Entertainment Center that looked a bit more this century.

But I forgot the dang card.  Apparently, without the card, nothing else counts.  Who knew?

Well, just as life is starting to get back to normal around here, I am being shipped off to a trade-show down in Baltimore for the weekend. (Yeah, I know…. poor me).  But seriously, trade shows leave me busy during the day, and bored (other than finally getting back to blogging) at night.

I depart early tomorrow morning, for a show that starts… tomorrow.  No pressure though.

So… any bloggers in the Baltimore, MD area want to meet up for a drink and tell me all the good things in the Inner Harbor area?

Things have been a bit slow around here as you may have noticed.  It has been a bit tough as I said good-bye to a second uncle in just over 2 weeks.  It also gave me a lesson in introspection as well as contrast.

When uncle #1 (mom’s brother-in law for those keeping score) passed away, I was sad.  He was a wonderful guy, a good father, friendly, happy go lucky, and all the good things you say about an all around nice guy that most people will miss.

When uncle #2 passed away, the only reason I was sad, was in taking the time to realize that he was the last of the siblings from my father’s side of the family.  Now, don’t get me wrong.  There are people that will miss him.  I just won’t be among them.  And it was this fact that gave me cause for my self analysis.

Until my grandmother passed away when I was almost 9 years old… I didn’t even know that uncle #2 existed.  His wife did not like my mother for some reason, and she continuously found fault with my mom.  She called her a gold-digger, this despite the fact that my mother worked as my father completed his college degree.  She had issues that my mom and dad had to adopt (something I am of course quite appreciative of them doing), and because of this neither, she nor uncle #2 never did anything to recognize either me or my sister.   Not once (even after she passed away), did we ever receive a birthday card, or Xmas card or anything else.  We just didn’t exist.

After uncle #2′s wife passed away, my mother and father both buried the hatchet with him to some degree, they invited him over the house on holiday’s so he wouldn’t be alone (his kids has long since moved out west), and my mother forced me to invite him to my wedding (which, honestly at this point, I can’t even tell you if he came or not.  Though I CAN tell you, if he did come… he didn’t give me a card!  Yes, the card is a big issue with me).

I however never quite got over it.  And that, to some degree I feel bad about.  I guess I am not as big a person as I like to think I am, because even though I feel bad about not getting over it, I still don’t have any desire to so.  And even though his passing marks the end of that part of the family tree, (since I apparently don’t according to him or his wife I don’t even belong looking at that family tree) will not shed a tear at his passing. I did what was “proper” and expected of me, out of respect for my mother, and the rest of the family.  But, I just can’t bury the hatchet.

I have had it.  People just stay away, because the only conclusion left is that I cause cancer.   How else do I look at it.  It is not region, the only common factor in this “cluster” of cases is… me.

I honestly didn’t think about it a couple of years ago, when my father passed away.  I was too concerned with mother dealing with Islet Cell Carcinoma (which she is battling quite well so far) to have started putting the correlations together as my Sister-In-Law whipped Breast Cancer into submission.  However, a sneaky suspicion started when my step-father-in-law passed away 8 or so months ago.

My string of “victims” continued when my uncle finally gave up, his body riddled with cancer.

Perhaps I should find myself a nice lead lined Panic Room, and stash myself in there.  Before somebody else contracts cancer.

In 1983, we saw the Return of the Jedi, Eddie Murphy and Dan Akroyd were Trading Places, Matthew Brodderick was playing War Games, while Tom Cruise was busy with some Risky Business. Everybody was watching J.R. down in Dallas, Hawkeye Pierece and BJ Honeycut were finally free of their M*A*S*H* unit, people were still cruising on The Love Boat, and when you were in trouble… and you could find them… you would call on, The A-Team.

We were living’ here in Allentown, driving our Little Red Corvette right down Electric Avenue. With Every Breath You Take, you would ask that Maneater, Do You Really Want to Hurt Me? But after realizing it was a Total Eclipse of the Heart, you would tell Billie Jean to Beat It.

On this date (June 1, 1983), a young, bright eyed dreamer was unleashed on the world. On this day, 25 years ago, I graduated from High School. I was so sure of so much back then. I “knew” I was going to do something great of course, I also knew that once my Miami Dolphins got Dan Marino in the draft that we simply had a lock on many Super Bowls in the future. When I think about it… I may have been wrong about Marino, and it may not have been what I was thinking at the time, but I can certainly claim at least one great thing.

Nope, graduating from High School no longer seems like “just yesterday.” Not any more.

I just need to survive.  That is my mantra for the next couple of weeks.

Wenesday, LatteGirl had her first Piano Recital (which went off very well thank you very much).

Tonight, she is “testing” to try and move up to a yellow belt in Karate.

As part of her birthday present LatteGirl wanted her room done over, which is something TheWife has wanted to do for a while anyway, but just to add to the fun, TheWife scheduled that done this week as well.  (Please don’t even get me started with the fact that with this make-over things like Winnie the Pooh pictures are on the way out to make room for Hannah Montana posters)

Next week is LatteGirl’s  birthday, and dance recital in the same weekend.  She follows that with finals.  FINALS!?!  When they hell did they start having final exams in second grade???

Ah well… sleep is highly overrated anyway.

A new reason to hate Comcast – Yes, I know there are some people that think they are Comcastic, but I have aboslutely no regrets leaving Comcast in the past.  First, I am happy about saving money, as I have since switching from Cable to DirecTV.  Second, I am thrilled that with Verizon Fios, I don’t have to worry (so far) about bandwidth throttling or the fact that they lie about it.  But now they have acquired Plaxo, a company that thinks spamming your contact list is tantamount to being a “Social Network” company.  Even if I did believe that Plaxo is Now Less Evil (which I don’t),  I would be damned if I was to turn over all my personal information and contacts into the hands of Comcast.

There is something wrong with these people – Who can seriously look at a 15 year old girl that is  5′ 9″ and weights 105 pounds and tell her she needs to loose a few pounds?  My dear friend Mitch McDad caught a bit of flack on this post when he said women do this for women and not for men.  But I have to say, that I agree.  There is no guy looking at some emaciated girl thinking, “I wish my wife/gf/so looked like that!”  Simply put, most men don’t find that “hot” at all.  Well… except for the designer’s themselves, and they seem to have some sort of vendetta against women, or at least that it the way it seems to me.

Be sure your children are safe from online predators… then stop and check again - Liz from This Full House got her own frightening wake up call on Internet Safety.  Go read it.  Then go and double check everything you have done to ensure your child can’t fall prey to some sick bastard that is stalking them on the Internet.

Like something out of a sitcom – IzzyMom has the Best.Newspaper.Clipping.Ever.   Perhaps, I am a bit insulated here in the New York/New Jersey area from vast trailer parks of this country and those that consider Wal-Mart a place you need to get dressed up to go to.

 Easy (Well Easier) for him to say – Adventure Dad has a good article on how being (or getting) fit is his Favorite Parenting Resource. If I wasn’t already working on improving myself, I think I might have been ashamed.  He makes some exellent points about how most people think about getting in shape all wrong.

If you don’t why not? – Have you checked out Ivy and Heather at Home Ec 101?   If not, you really should.  Tips, tricks, recipes, and every so often a guest tip (wink).  Ivy may be having an unnatural love affair with a container of Bar Keeper’s Friend (I’m kidding… mostly) but their advise is helpful, friendly and has saved my butt on more than one occasion (and that is no joke).

OK, not really… but now that I have your attention, let me tell you what happened this past weekend. It was Saturday, a relatively warm, cloudy day here in New Jersey. Like every Saturday for the past few months, my routine was the same, I would go out on my back deck, enjoy a cup of coffee and my morning cigarette (yes, I know… don’t go there), the dogs run around the yard, and then I get ready and head off to the gym. So like every other Saturday morning, I knew exactly what the condition of the yard was (mostly I note whether I will be mowing or doing yard work that day). Nothing was particularly amiss or out of the usual.

As I was coming home, TheWife calls me and says the our patio set is “broken” (I really must speak to her about her ability to understate a situation). I arrived home to find that the tempered glass top of our patio set had shattered into nothing but a chards of glass. I mean tiny. The pieces were so small that you could fit two or three of them on a dime. I found this quite baffling. Now granted tempered glass is supposed to break in a way that prevents thos huge sharp edges from forming, but in the past, I had only seen the tiny pieces at point of impact when something broke the glass, and the rest sort of hung together in a “sheet” of broken pieces. In this case the entire tabletop was completely in chards. I did my best Gil Grissom imitation (other than taking photos… dammit), looking for a cause. There were no rocks, sticks, branches from a tree or other projectiles within the rubble. The ring that protects the center hold where the umbrella goes had fallen straight down and landed on the leg of the table, so obviously the table came straight down, and not at some angle. There was no blood to indicate that a squirrel or other animal had landed on it crashing through. I even entertained the notion that since I live in the flight path of Newark Liberty International Airport that it was a case of “blue ice” and that in the midday sun, it had just melted… but even that would have left some sort of residue from the dye (and or contained waste…ewww). No, nothing seemed to fit.

The table, was one I had purchased from K-Mart a couple of years ago, one of their Martha Stewart line of tables. I was talking about it this week to somebody, and decided to look up some information on Tempered Glass, and at first found this article discussing how when tempered glass is compromised in some way that it can seem like it just “explodes.” Back into Google for a search of “Tempered Glass Exploding” and there… the first article up (at least at the time I did the search), was this little piece called, “Sounds of Summer: Martha Stewart Tables Shattering.” Turns out, this “phenomenon” that had struck our table was not at all uncommon.

There is apparently even a class action lawsuit that is in the works against Martha Stewart Living Omnipedia and JRA Funiture.  However, JRA Funiture filed Chapter 7 Bakruptcy (total liquidation) last year, so at least they are no longer the source (depending on inventories of course) of the tables, but it also means no recovery for the Class Action Lawsuit either.

I’d like to think that with JRA Funiture out of business that this is the end of the situation, but to be honest, reading how Sears (and/or Kmart) and Martha Stewart Living have not even (so far as I can tell) acknowledged this as a problem, outside of saying they will work with consumers under warranty, leaves me a little ill at ease with them, leaving me doubting whether I want to trust them again.  Problem is, at least the old sets were also farmed out under different names to other chains as well.  JRA’s funiture was also sold under the Hampton Bay name at Home Depot, as well as being carried by Sam’s Club, Target and Safeway. (Only Home Depot has has a similar report of an exploding table that I have been able to find so far).

If you have (or had) one of these sets,  if your table is still under warranty you can call K-mart Customer Service about it at 866-562-7848 (though K-Mart has not specifically said they will honor the manufacturer’s warranty) or Home Depot (who will honor the warranty) at 800-585-9969.  Other than that you are probably out of luck.  So what does this all mean?  I guess, most of all be careful if you are going to buy a glass top patio set from a discount retailer.  In my case, I am thinking a nice teak set might be in our future instead of risking it with glass again.

I, like many people have battled weight issues a good part of my life. Despite what many “skinny” people will claim, it is not a “choice.” Is it something I can do something about? In my case, yes. At least I have managed to do it before, and with weight loss of almost 16 pounds since April 17th, I am making some progress again.

But this isn’t really about that fight. No, this is something that has been simmering since my Step-Father-In-Law passed away from Lung Cancer last year. It bothered me at the time, but I wasn’t completely sure why, but there was a gnawing at me about this. Mostly, I guess because I felt it was so unfair that by the time it was “discovered” he was given six-to-nine months and didn’t last that long, that I dismissed what was bothering me as just the sort of bitterness you have when you lose a loved one to illness.

Well, a couple of weeks ago, my uncle was diagnosed with Lung cancer. Fortunately, in his case, it is currently considered early enough that while the long term prognosis is not good (can it ever be?), there actually IS so far, a long term prognosis. Something, that my Step-Father-In-Law never “enjoyed.” I started rethinking it, and using “the Google” to seek some others information and similar type of incidents and stories. I probably shouldn’t be shocked in this day and age to actually find a Blog dedicated to the topic of fat prejudice in health care. This is exactly what was bothering me all this time, and a couple of delicately placed questions to my mother-in-law confirmed this.

He had complained of shortness-of-breath and several other symptoms for quite some time before his diagnosis. Every time his Primary Care Physicians “diagnosis” was that he needed to lose weight, and that then it would no longer be an issue. Symptoms overlooked, simply because, well if you are fat… that is the problem and the end of the effort by the physician (in these cases).

I would love to think that this is infrequent and isolated with a few “bad seeds,” but when you see things like, UNC-Chapel Hill: Obesity May Keep Some Women from Getting Screened for Breast, Cervical Cancer it seems clear that this is not the case, and Kate Harding has a excellent breakdown of this story and how (and why) this issue exists. (On a side note, Kate’s Shapely Prose blog is an excellent read.)  There are even studies published on the Stigma and Discrimination in Weight Mangement and Obesity.

Of course, the media is not much help in this regard either.  Yes, there are some articles that point properly at some causes and issues, but doing so is “too politcally correct” for some writers, and just a lifestyle choice for others.  Of course even some governments get involved as well when they do something like tell a person that they are ‘too fat to adopt.’

It is like continuing to get picked on by the school yard bully for being overweight.  Only the sonsequences to your health could be far more severe.

I’ve been stewing on this one a while, and while I have made mention of it before, it was always just more of an afterthought; but after encountering it yet again this past weekend, I think I have finally had enough.  By now I am sure most of you (well all three of you), are saying “get to the point” so I will.  Why is it that “everybody” (especially it seems older people, and for some reason very religious people) seem to have this particularly invasive idea that they have the right (or almost responsibility) to inquire about your reproductive plans?  Oh, and if that isn’t enough, then they are going to judge you on it based on what they have determined is the “right” thing.

When TheWife and I were first married, it was the constant (and somewhat typical) question of “when are you going to start a family?”  The fact that we waited 6 years was almost unconscionable to some people and family members.  I won’t even get into what my poor sister has to go through since she and her husband have opted to not have children.  For these people, can I just point out that people actually get married for reasons other than to start pushing out children.

Of course, fortunately the reason that we did not have a child right away was because of choice.  I know (both in real life, and many others that I have come to know through blogging) that haven’t because of medical problem.  This of course serves to act as a big slap in the face, and can (and usually does) open some painful emotions in people struggling to have a child, when these reproductive nazis…er… well intended individuals, come along and decide to poke their noses in and demanding answers.

Lately, the new question has come up about when are we going to have another child (now with the extra bonus of them reminding me that I am not getting any younger). The incredulous looks and shocked to downright snarky replies we get when we say we are done with one is a sight to behold.  You would think that I had just put an end to the chances of the human race’s chance of survival.  Then they begin the prodding, because they all need to know the “real” reason.  Is it physical problems?  Is there something wrong with LatteGirl that makes of afraid of another child?  Is it money? (because apparently when you have enough kids, you can live on love) Wouldn’t it be easier to have more if TheWife didn’t work?  (That one of course is insulting on assorted levels and goes into other issues I am not going to touch now)  They just cannot accept that this was the choice we made.  I had somewhat jokingly come up with the response of “We can only afford to raise and spoil one properly” just to try and head off the amount of time I would have to deal with their probing questions.   But to be honest, I am tired of using it as an answer, because I see no reason that I should feel compelled to answer.

The answer is “Just Because” and I am done with it.  LatteGirl is quite well adjusted thank you, and I know plenty of other only children at various stages of life to know that being an only child does not guarantee that they will not know how function in society as you seem to like to claim.  While I like to use the term, somewhat loosely “spoiled” she certainly isn’t.  She knows and has boundaries, she can play well with others, and is able to wait her turn, and doesn’t expect to always be first, just because that is “what she has always known” without competition from siblings.  I don’t question your choice to have more than one child, even if it means going beyond your financial means  (well, except for you Michelle and Jim Bob Duggar!!  17 kids?  WTF is wrong with you people?) .

While I am busy annoying people today, let us take a side rant here.  Why is it that people are against the use of condoms, or birth control because it “messes up” some divine plan, and that if “god” (or your personal choice of term) sees fit to bless you with a child, you should not “interfere” with this plan… but yet these same people seem to have absolutely no problem with fertility clinics and drugs that attempt to help in difficult situations (just to be clear, I do not have a problem with EITHER situation, I just don’t understand why messing with “the plan” is OK when you want to have a child, but not when you don’t).  Simiarly confusing to me is why there is nobody protesting, bombing or trying to shame men that go to a place that offers a vasectomy.  Doesn’t that mess with “the plan” as well?

What does this little side rant have to do with anything?  Well, it really all ties up quite nicely in the end… Stay the hell out of our choices.  My wife and I will choose what is best for us.  And the only reason I will give from now on is “Just Because!”

It doesn’t take much to know that at present Flickr rules the image sharing world.  Discourse from long time users over Flickr adding video recently (and some time ago, complaints when Flickr finally integrated its login with Yahoo!), aside very few people have anything bad to say about the product.  But that being said, often the underdogs sometimes try harder and are more willing to take risks and offer newer and cooler features in their attempts to catch up.  And I wanted to see what if any affect this had on the picture sharing world.  After all, most parents love having a nice and convenient way to share their photos with friends and/or relatives.

My first stop, and this weeks spotlight is on Google’s Picasa Web Albums.  This extension to the Picasa photo library software that Google acquired in 2004 seemed like an excellent place to start.  The Picasa software was tops in managing your photos, circa 2004, but has grown a bit long in the tooth and has fallen behind other competing products both online and off, with very little in the way of capabilities added with the exception of adding the Web Albums portion.

I was immediately put off and somewhat shocked at the 1GB space limit.  Where they really serious?  I mean sure virtually every photo sharing service offers some sort of "pro" upgrade that gives you additional functionality or the ability to upload more per month, but a flat 1GB of space for storage before having to purchase additional?  You can purchase additional storage, but this is where things get a bit murky, because the space you purchase is "shared" between your Gmail and Picasa accou nts.  I guess this is good for some people, but I have been using Gmail since 2004, and haven’t come anywhere near hitting that 6 GB storage limit, so I guess it really doesn’t matter that the space is shared, and conversely if I go over my 10 GB of purchased space, my Picasa account can actually use some of the excess Gmail space I have.

But things like photo albums are really meant to be cumulative over time, and in theory only grow over time. 

As for the product itself, as like many Google products the interface is sparse, clean looking and in theory simple.  I say in theory, because while there is not a lot of confusing additives, it is also not particularly intuitive or friendly.  It is not difficult to figure out, but some of the interface choices (and the number of clicks to do virtually anything) can be annoying.

You don’t have much (read… ANY) control on how the album is displayed outside of choosing small, medium or large  thumbnails.  Some features like being able to pin the features onto a map, may appeal to some, but I don’t see any great appeal for this feature to make it worth storing pictures here over another site. 

I also found the "slow" upload (upload large full sized photos instead of scaled back one) to be true to its word.  It is slow.  Painfully slow.  So if you are planning to dump a lot up there, have something else planned to kill the time.

In the end, it is there.  And if you happen to use Picasa anyway, and you already have a Google account, well it is there, and (for the first GB) it is free.  But, I certainly wouldn’t "switch" to this service from something else.  I’m really surprised, I expected the company that was smart enough to start the search engine ability to search images (or at least the first to make it easy) would make more of this service.  But so far, that is not the case.

All is right with the world once again. Not only did the Devils finally take a game from the New York Rangers for the first time this year, but it game them home ice for the series.

And to top it off, I just scored super tickets to Game 2 on Friday night.

It will be a long, painful summer for me if the Devils lose to the Rangers in the first round as most of my hockey loving friends are Rangers fans.  But I am confident going in.  The fact that it took until the last game of the season to finally beat their cross-river nemesis is of no matter any longer.  This is playoff season!  To top it off ESPN analyst Scott Burnside has picked the Rangers, which to me virtually guarantees a Devils victory.

While over at Career and Kids, I was directed to the proclamation of, You do not lose your brain when you have kids. And while the demise of the mother’s brain (or in reality both parent’s but mother’s usually suffer the brunt of the claims of brain loss) is greatly exaggerated, there is some validity to it also.

Now, I say greatly exaggerated partly because, I defy you to find a mother (and most father’s if they are honest) that hasn’t laid claim to “Mom’s Heimers” or some other classification of “forgetfulness” This is probably the root of problem in people believing that a mother “loses her brain” It is the self-deprecation, the “I am the world’s worst mom” speeches, or even proudly proclaiming, Not winning mother of the year. This is what gets blown out of proportion.

But there is more to it than that. Don’t get me wrong, I actually do not disagree with many of Pam’s points, many parent’s thrive in a way they never imagined they would before they had their kids. But, you are a threat to “the collective” (at least you are if you are the type of parent that is reading this post, or any other parent blog. Why, because you are the type of person that tries to “strike a balance” between work and family life, and those in “corporate” don’t like that. They didn’t like it in the days when the work day was closer to the “storybook” 9 to 5, they downright hate it now.

When I was let go of Bear Sterns back in early 2006 (luckily for me as it turns out), it wasn’t because of my work.  It wasn’t even because of my pay (I took a 30% paycut to fit into the structure there, thinking there was a future there… ha!).  No, the problem was my bosses were single people.  They couldn’t understand my not being a “team player.”  It didn’t matter that I would work nights from home, it didn’t matter that I arrived earlier than anybody else.  All these people saw was somebody that didn’t stay in the office “enough” hours.  I wasn’t a “team player.”  I wanted to do things that made absolutely no sense to them, like go to my daughter’s dance recital, or I would have to call in because at times, I was the one that had to stay home with LatteGirl if she were home sick from school.  It is not that I got any additional time off, than anybody else, but it “seemed” like I took more time off (to them) because I was out “all those days” in small individual day blocks rather than “2 weeks in Aspen.” which was OK with them.

To them (and I only used them as an example, I have seen it both in places I have worked since, and even places that I worked when I was still “free” to spend 18 hours in the office.  So, it is nice to say, that you don’t lose you brains, the problem is, you need to find another parent in order to find somebody that will believe you.

With all the rush into various forms of "social media" the task has become trying to find a way to harness it all, and make it easier to manage.  Trying to keep track of friends is becoming increasingly complex, between blogs, social networks like Facebook, Twitter, Flickr, etc.  There are several different aggregators out there that try to pull it all together for you, such as FriendFeed; but with their own comment systems that do not feedback into the original, they only seem to create yet another location that you need to check for friends and comments.

This is where the Flock Browser is supposed to come in.  It is built on and functions very much like a standard standard Firefox Browser, which is both the source of its strength and a source of annoyance, since it is just different enough that plugins and skins you may wish to use with it may or may not work with Flock.

The browser has potential, and you can see how these would be an ideal solution for those of us that want to manage our social media, and still possibly have time left over to help the kids with their homework.  Unfortunately, version 1.1 doesn’t seem quite ready for prime time quite yet, and some features are not quite full featured or half implemented.

For example, the Twitter feed is a unique implementation.  It pulls and creates a box for each of your followers with their picture and last tweet.  You can either leave them ordered by name (which is about as useless as can be unless you have nothing more than a handful of people you follow), or by most recent tweet.  This is a fun way to use it as each person pops to the top when they tweet.  However since there is no history of tweets, you can not scroll back to see a previous tweet, and much then click-through to open the web site.  There are also a couple of bugs, such as any tweets or user name that contains extended characters (a music note, TM symbol, etc) breaks the feed until you restart.

The prominent base is supposed to be the My World Page.  The page is broken down into ":widgets" for displaying certain features.  Theoretically there will be more going forward but there appears to be currently three.  The first  which is like a headline reader from any rss source you choose, is functional, but only takes up one of the three columns (even if you aren’t using the other widgets) so again if you have more than a say 10 or so feeds you want headlined, you wind up scrolling a lot and lose the "at a glance" ease that it is supposed to give you.

There is currently only one theme for Flock, and that is a love it or hate it sort of look and feel.  It is very compact, providing more real estate for your viewable space.  But it has what I can only describe as a very "plastic" look to it.  The best way I can describe it would be to say, imagine how toy knobs look on a children’s version of say a toy camera compared with a real one.  The GUI though would not be a deal-breaker and I am sure sooner or later somebody will start crafting some themes for it, but in the mean time, it is just the final nit-pik on a browser that promises so much, but isn’t quite ready to deliver the goods.  It is worth keeping an eye on after some bug fixes and perhaps some features get completed.

For many years the ritual was the same, in the winter, I grew a beard, in the summer off it came. That was until LatteGirl asked me several years ago, to not shave everything off. Instead I kept the goatee, and stuck with that year round. Until this year. This year I decided to bring back the full beard.

What I forgot however on this particular Pre-Easter Saturday, was just how cold my face would feel when I stepped outside.  I’m sure when summertime comes, I will be happy I did this, but while it is still cold, I am so far regretting it.

Before

After

I was watching Wizards of Waverly Place with LatteGirl, when I noticed the father looked familiar… seeing the credits I noted it was David DeLuise.

I suddenly shuddered… Could this really be?  Am I that old?  Was I looking at the kid that I used to watch on 21 Jump Street now a middle age father on a Disney Channel Show?   How could it be any worse I thought.

Firing up IMDB, I discovered I was wrong.  I had mistaken David for his brother Peter DeLuise.  And then I found out how it could be worse… David is the younger brother of that kid I watched on 21 Jump Street.  Someday I am going to learn to stop asking that “can it get any worse” question.  Because the answer is always yes.   To put the cherry on top of this one… Peter is about a year younger than I am.

It has been long known that the U.S. Military (along with many others, this is not a American phenomenon), uses propaganda in times of war. Planes littering villages with leaflets, buying of air time and ads in newspapers in a sort of psychological warfare. But tactics like these are (or were) supposed to be strictly controlled; as a matter of fact by trying to be more coy about it, the United States came under fire when they admitted they were planting stories in Iraq newspapers as “news articles.”

But it certainly seems that those days of propaganda planting being kept out of our news streams is history. Oh sure, it has been blatantly obvious for some time that the Faux News Channel is little more than “right wing mouthpiece” and tries to twist things to fit that image, but certain talk shows hosts aside (*cough* Hannity, O’Reilly *cough*) the data is usually twisted but not typically made up. Not so in this recent false article planted in Time Magazine. Glenn Greenwald over at Salon.com has done a nice job of comparing the unsubstantiated (false) claims in the Time article piece, with something that the author of the Time article couldn’t be bothered with, facts and numbers.

It is really sad, that you now have to be critical about everything you read.  It is at a point where I trust very few sources of information outside my blogroll.  I may not agree with all of you all the time, but at least there, I know if people don’t know, they don’t know, they don’t just make up the facts as they go along.

It really is a sad place we are in right now.

TheWife informed me that burying my head in the sand was not going to make the problem go away.  On the one hand, I know she is right, but on the other…well, it just kills me to say it… I mean I don’t understand… She is only 7 (yes, honey I know, 7 and 3/4)… how am I supposed to reconcile and admit my failures as a parent and come to terms with the fact that my sweet little princess is an addict.

I don’t know where she picked up her need for “K” (although to confuse matters more, some know it by another terms starting with “C”) and how she got hooked.  None of the early warning signs were there, she continues to do well in school and her behavior hasn’t changed. I know all of her friends, as well as their parents.  They are all good people.  So where did this come from.  The only real clue  that something was wrong, was her eating habits.  She has always been a fussy eater, and getting her to try new things has always been a raging battle… until recently.  Suddenly she is willing to try some new things, and has expanded her food lineup, but things turn suddenly different when she doesn’t have her”fix” readily available.

I don’t even know where to turn.  They don’t have any programs for this (that I know of), and even if they did, I somehow doubt they would be equipped to deal with somebody so young.  TheWife has confronted her on the issue, and she continues to stubbornly deny even having a problem (and is even cavalier about her using).  I just don’t get it, how… How… HOW could my sweet little one be hooked on… Ketchup?

It has been an interesting past couple of weeks. As I mentioned, I was looking at a possible opportunity, which would take up quite a bit of time, but could be a huge career move. Well, as things wound down through discussions and proposals, it was looking quite shakey. Instead of looking at whether or not a promotion would come through, it began to look more and more like I would be looking for a new client soon.

So, when I got called into a meeting with the CEO, CFO and several top level managers, I was prepared for, “We appreciate everything, but your position has now been eliminated.” This has pretty much been the status quo around here lately for anybody that has had a meeting with our CEO.

Instead, with the proposal I had written in hand, questions were thrown around the room. First directed at me, at how this implementation would work, the cost structures, etc. Then it was put to the others. Whether they believed what I had proposed was viable, and financially sound… and of course more importantly (to me anyway), whether I was the one that could navigate this.

As it turns out, I had garnered more support than I originally anticipated, and not only did they see fit to have me continue, I am now in charge… of everything. Me! I know I should be thrilled, and I am confident that it can be done, but me being a boss just seems, well odd. After all, while I have never been fired for posting a Dilbert comic strip, I have been known to circulate them around at several jobs, I have had in the past, criticizing those in management.

So, where does that leave me now?  I have always in the past avoided such management positions, because I have always been more comfortable as the “doer” and not the manager.  Can the one that has always scoffed at mangement, become management?  Am I the new Pointy Haired Boss?   Can I be different, and actually be a boss without becoming the “idiot” that everybody posts comics about?  I am certainly sure I will be nicer to those that work for me that those that I have worked for in the past.  But then again, doesn’t everybody usually start out with the best of intentions, not to be the same jerk as those that went before?  Is the Peter Principal just an inevitability?  I guess only time will tell.

In the mean time, I can only hope I can get back to blogging and commenting on other blogs on a more regular schedule again.  I need the outlet.  If anything, hopefully it will help stave off the metemophesis from employee to corporate drone as long as possible.

Me?  In Charge?  Sorry, it still sounds odd to me.

Now, admittedly, I already like looking at “the stars” and there is no doubt that I would have taken the time to see the lunar eclipse last week. But since LatteGirl would already be asleep when the full eclipse took place, I promised to break out my new camera and take some photographs.

In all fairness, it is a promise I never should have made. While I like taking pictures, I am by no means a “photographer.” Add to that, I have had precious little time to learn and play with all the new capabilities that the new camera has, and it was a recipe for disaster. But this was of course, the last total lunar eclipse until 2010, so I figured I would give it a shot (so to speak).

Now the week before (actually only several days before) we had some unseasonably warm weather.  But of course this particular evening was not so kind, and of course, I found myself out of firewood for the chimenea.  So, I brewed a pot of coffee, bundled up, set up the tripod and had at it.

With no real “second chances” to do this again, I fired off about 100 shots, at various depths of field, and shutter speeds and ISOs until I found what I thought was the best balance.  From there, I would take each picture from that level, and then again with both up and down two steps from there.  (Thank goodness, an eclipse is not a fast moving event).  In the end, I came up with about 20 shots that I am satisfied with (10 of which have already been uploaded into flickr, such as the one in the right hand corner).  I was wishing at the time, that I had made a greater investment for a real SLR and lenses, but truth be told, until I master the basics a bit more, it probably would have been a waste.  A camera is only as good as the person working it, and I still have some learning to do.

With about an 80% “failure” rate, I was seriously wondering why they hell I went through all of that.  Until the next day.  As I was sorting through the pictures, and using Gimp to clean them up a bit (BTW, image processing, another area I have a LOT to learn.) LatteGirl came over and spotted the pictures.  She was thrilled.  She loved them all (even the less that great shots), and spent the better part of 10 minutes hugging me and thanking me for all the “great” pictures of the eclipse.  She even begged me to print out of couple so she could show them off at school.  Suddenly, I forgot how cold it was standing out there for several hours, or how little sleep I wound up getting before heading off to work the next day, or how disappointed I was with having so few decent shots to show for the effort.  Suddenly, it was all so worth it.

What is it going to take to stop people from packing a supermarket the day before a snowstorm, and shopping like they are going to be homebound until spring?  Does everybody just happen to need bread and milk the day before a storm?

Look if you happen to live in one of those places where the “corner store” is “follow this road five miles, make a left where old man Fogarty’s barn used to be, and head down the mountain,”  well then maybe you have some justification.  Or, of course if you are say advanced in years, where the thought walking on snow and/or ice instills visions of broken hips and nursing homes, well maybe you should prepare to be inside a bit longer.  I even understand everybody running to Blockbuster, because of the potential of kids at home for a snow day, and needed something to keep them occupied.

Other than that, honestly people, what are you thinking?  That the horse drawn carriage isn’t going to be able to get Bessie’s milk to the market? That old Mrs. Pumpernickel won’t be able to find enough fire wood to bake some bread?   Just why is it that this insane habit continues today?

I consider myself a tech junkie, but even so the world of music somewhat eludes me.  Between myself and TheWife, we have gone through untold numbers of earbuds and such for her iPod.  For me, I have stuck with the earbuds that came with my Zune since I acquired it, and was satisfied with them.  However, our Basset Hound, which apparently thinks he is part goat, decided they were a midnight snack, and ate them.  Literally ate the buds right off of the wire.

So, now I am in search of new earbuds.  (Since I generally stuff this in my coat pocket, I would rather not go with full headphones.)  But am having a heck of a time deciding what to get.  I don’t want to go too cheap and get some lousy sounding, or poorly fitting buds.  But am not an audiophile enough to want (or even be able to discern the quality difference) to spend a hundred dollars (or more) on a new set.

So I am curious, for those of you that use third party or aftermarket earbuds… what do you use?  Are you happy with them?

I usually laugh at parents that post about the mythical beast of “balance” between work and home.  I do this usually because it seems like the search is for the one “right” answer, and anybody who has been playing this high wire act long enough knows… there is no one right answer, nor is it even really a constant.  It changes as life changes.

I have basically considered myself pretty lucky.  I have for the most part been able to find a situation that has worked well for me.  Sure, I have passed over a few promotions and positions that would have paid more, but required extensive travel.  But the reality is that I have had that luxury.  I have still managed to make a good enough living, and still managed to be around for LatteGirl.  Have a missed some things or am I around as much as I would like to be?  Of course not, but I have found a place that works for me.

Well, I did.  But now that is being challenged.  I got an offer that is too good to refuse.  There is some risk involved (minimal) but high reward potential.  But it means longer hours, more travel, and a whole lot more stress.  Oh sure I guess I could quit and look for something else, but there is no guarantee that this would provide me with any more flexibility.  I can almost certainly make as much if not more money if I start to commute into Manhattan again.  But, even when I was managing to find the time to be home, I was so wiped out, that I might as well not have been home at all.

So, what is my point?  I guess a big mea culpa.  That even if you accept that “balance” is whatever you can do, there are going to be times, that you will still feel off balance.   That even if you know the beast if only a myth, you will still at times find yourself struggling to find him.

In 1988, I was a young “rebel.” Rebel, in a Alex Keaton kind of a way. I didn’t understand politics nearly as well as I thought I did, and (at the time) certainly thought that Ronald Reagan was far and away better than anything that the Democratic Party was offering in the way of leadership.

That was not the scary part. Stay with me here.

1988 was also the year that I got a letter to the Editor published. Fine, it was in the Jersey Journal, a local newspaper that barely has a readership in its own area. But I was happy about it anyway. So, apparently was my mom, who unbeknownst to me, kept a copy of the paper that the article appeared.

Several months back, she had given me a box of different papers and such that she had saved over the years (since my father’s passing in 2004, she has slowly been “getting ready to die” by ridding herself of things that she had saved over th years and given them to me or my sister). In there were old report cards, clipping from sports stories about Little League, “reviews” from local play productions I was in, and among that I found the letter to the editor.

I won’t bore you (or embarrass myself) by revealing everything the young naive version of myself wrote at the time. But in there was little snippet that I thought was quite interesting (and scary in its accuracy. The emphasis added is mine now, and not in the published letter). “… and Geraldine Ferraro was a complete embarrassment. Not that I saw anybody else that could help Mondale actually win the hearts and minds of the country to a point that he would’ve stood a chance, but if I were a woman, I would have be absolutely flabbergasted by this. She is going to throw the woman’s movement back so far, that it will be 20 years before a woman can actually hope to run and have any real chance at the White House.”

And here we are exactly 20 years later.

Update:  I should have been clearer on this.  The article was written in 1988, in reference to Michael Dukakis, but went back and referenced this as series of lousy contenders put forth by the Democratic Party. (Now you know why there is a discrepancy in the years.  Thanks to those who e-mailed me for clarification)

If you know the song the title is from, like me you probably have a young one with a Hannah Montana obsession. Now, I have so far been very accommodating, and have proved myself a worthy sucker for Disney’s marketing machine. I used to wonder how they made money on their shows and movies on the Disney Channel without the benefit of advertising (although I have noticed the “proud sponsor” spots sneaking in much like they now do on PBS shows, but that is a different rant for another day). Now I know where they make the money.

We have clothes, dolls, I was one of the fortunate parents that was able to get tickets (at face value) for the concert, and  Santa Claus even came across with the Digital Blue 718 Disney Mix Stick Hannah Montan Mp3 Player (a compromise between me wanting her to have her own music player, and TheWife thinking she was too young for a “real” MP3 player).

Now of course, since our TV rarely leaves the Disney Channel, I of course knew that the Hannah Montana 3D movie was coming.  I was somewhat hoping (fine I was in denial) that since she went to the actual concert, she would not be interested in going to see the movie.  Of course this was NOT the case.  But fine I thought, it is just a movie.

What I didn’t anticipate (and did not see in the commercials until this past week) is that this movie is being release for “1 week only.”  Which in many of the theaters (at least around here) means they are only showing it 1 or 2 days.   Then TheWife informs me that tickets are $15!!!  $15 for a movie that is barely over an hour long!  But things don’t stop there.  No, since there are only a total of 6 shows over two days, the closest theater to us that is showing the movie is SOLD OUT!  TheWife was actually considering (before I found tickets at another theater) trying to buy tickets through a ticket broker.  Can you imagine this?  Scalping tickets to a movie?

Fortunately as I said, I was able to find tickets at another theater, because there was no way I was “paying up” for tickets to the movie.  So, TheWife and LatteGirl will get to see Hannah in 3D (Noooo, I’m not going… not at $15 per).  And I am left to ponder, is Disney out of their freakin’ minds?  Or am I?

Nerves started to set in before we reached the mountain. Both for me and for LatteGirl. In the end she stood strong, got on the skis, went for it, and had a blast.   The kids and the adult lessons were on separate areas, so I walked back and forth between the two of them, watching them progress through the lesson.  However, I stopped checking on TheWife after a while, because every time I seemed to come back to LatteGirl, she was in the next stage of her lessons already.  She blew threw her lessons so fast, she was out on the (bunny) slopes, while the other kids she was with in a group lesson were still 2 step back in the progression to the slopes.

Me on the other hand… well… I opted out. Not solely out of fear of another injury (but I will admit it was part… conditions, granular but icy, were just too similar for my comfort.  I may have even had a flashback as I stood there looking up at the mountain.), but also so I could play a supporting role in ensuring that LatteGirl and TheWife’s first trip skiing was a pleasant experience. So, I played pack mule, and arranger, and of course photograher, so all they had to worry about was enjoying themselves. And they did.
I have to admit, by the end of the day, part of me (the part that was fearful earlier) was regretting not getting up the nerve to get back on those skis. The part of me that was exhausted just from trying to ensure everything went right with this excursion however, was glad that I didn’t try to do all of the little things that I had to do and try to ski on top of it.

So how much fun did the two of them have?  Well, let me put it this way.  Next Monday, while I am at work, and they are enjoying a day off (Martin Luther King Jr. Day) they are planning to hit the slopes again without me.  I guess they don’t want me and my nerves dragging down their mood.  But who knows, as enthusiatic as they are about it right now, they just might be able to get me back on the slopes yet.

If at first you don’t succeed, try try again. If you fall off a horse, you need to get right back on. Two cliché terms, I like many parents (I assume) use often to encourage, to keep from giving up. Worthwhile sentiments I always thought. But then they came back to get me.

To make a short story long, back in January of 1986 was the last time I could be found on a pair of skis. On that day, conditions were a bit icy under some fresh snow. On that day, that fresh snow covered a sign that showed which path belonged to my green square, and which led down to the double diamonds. I had no business being on the slopes I wound up on. And to keep this story from getting too out of hand, I broke both ankles by the time I rolled back into the lodge.

The slopes never beckoned loud enough for me to ever think about it again.  (Insert wavy picture here as we return to modern day).  Now, TheWife and LatteGirl have decided that they would like to hit the slopes.  I had no real desire, though I agreed to tag along and have the Hot Chocolate ready for when they returned.  As LatteGirl pressed me on why I didn’t want to go, without going into details, I told her that I had a bad fall the last time I was skiing.

And that is when she hit me with it.  “You always tell me, that when you fall you have to dust yourself off, and get right back and do it again.”  No amount of “yeah but”s would deter her, and she pounded me with my own sage advise.  (Why yes, I did call my advise sage.  Full of myself?  Nah!)

So, now backed into a corner, 21 years later, quite a few pounds heavier, and no where near as good shape as I was then, I will once again find myself on a set of skis, since it was obvious that I had to put my money (or advise in this case) where my mouth is, and lead by example (even if I am “leading” by kicking and screaming that I don’t want to the whole way).

Perhaps I should leave somebody with the keys to the blog… you know… just in case.

Now that I am done feeling sorry for myself, I should probably cover some of the good things that come up this holiday season. One in particular caught me completely by surprise, and to date now would be what I would call my best present ever. It came in a slim little envelope, and I was pretty sure I knew what it was before I had even opened it. A ticket to a New Jersey Devils hockey game. Something I enjoy going to several times a year, and especially now that they have moved to the new Prudential Center which is much closer and easier to get to than the old Brendan Byrne Arena…er… I mean…Continental Airlines Arena…whoops check that now it is the Izod Center. (Did I mention how much I hate this corporate name sponsorship stuff?)

Anyway, unless I happen to be going to a game with my sister and brother-in-law this is a trek I usually make alone. But when I opened my gift, I found 2 tickets. It turns out that LatteGirl has decided that she wants to go to a hockey game with dear old dad. Now it may sound silly to some, but you can’t imagine how happy this made me. I love hockey, and always imagined I would be able to share my passion for the sport with her. As the picture to the right (circa 2001) shows, I had been grooming her for this from the very beginning.

However, as she grew older, things changed. My little fan, who I was feeding at 1 am when the Devils beat the Dallas Stars in 2000, and cheered with me for every goal, and consoled me when the Devils lost to the Avalanche in 2001, was no longer interested in sports. She was a girly-girl more interested in dolls and princesses. The Red and White Devil’s jersey was no longer fashionable enough for her (hmmm… I wonder if they have a Devil’s Jersey in pink), and she would rather watch Raven or Zach and Cody or Hannah Montana than to even think about watching a hockey game any longer. It was not as if I was heartbroken or anything. I am not one of those fans that use “we” when talking about a team I am a fan of, as if I was actually part of it. But, I was sad that I wouldn’t have this to share with her.

So, knowing that, you can imagine what a warm feeling (understatement) it was when, as I had a confused look on my face when I found two tickets, she jumped up and declared that the other ticket was for her and that she was going to the game with me.

So tonight we will eat overpriced greasy junk food, snap some pictures (so that I have proof that this isn’t all just a dream), survey the landscape for tomorrow’s outing to find out where the MileyWorld bus will be set up before the concert (hey I gotta make some concessions here), and cheer on the Devils as they take on the Buffalo Sabres.

Regardless of the outcome of the game, tonight, at least for a night, I am the winner.

There was something wrong with me this holiday season.  I know it, but I don’t know exactly what it was.  Nothing felt “right”  nothing seemed to fit quite as it should (I don’t mean clothing smart ass), and it was all rather uncomfortable.  I am actually quite happy that the majority of it all is now in the past, and I can hope for a better mood next year.

I know to stop and appreciate everything I have.  I am very fortunate.  And I was able to at least recognize that this year.   In my head anyway.  It still just never felt right.  By all weights and measures, this should be a dream, but it wasn’t.  Yet 5 years ago should have been a nightmare, and that may have been one of the best years ever.

5 years ago, I was working at Toys R Us because every dang technology company seemed to not have any openings after everybody that got laid off between the Dot Com Bust and the mess of 9/11.  Those that did have positions, would not hire me me because I had too much experience and they were sure I would bolt as soon as the economy got better.  So instead I was working 60 hours a week at Toys R Us, busting my ass for way too little money.  We were financially struggling to survive.  IRAs and 401Ks emptied.  No savings left.  We were just trying to find a way to hold onto the house.

Xmas that year was obviously going to be a difficult one for presents.  But LatteGirl was 2-1/2, and this was the first Xmas LatteGirl really fully understood Santa Claus and presents.  We couldn’t just “skip” Xmas.  So, I took every hour of overtime that they would give me.  I would rummage through the items that were going to hit the clearance tables to see what bargains I could find that I might be able to afford.  Meanwhile, the rest came from a few rummage sales and a few visits to several different dollar stores looking for items that weren’t junk quality.

By the time Xmas morning rolled around, we had a decent “stack” of presents from Santa, that looked like a lot, but in the end cost us less than $40 total.  While in some ways I felt bad, and swore to myself that we would never go through that again, it was still quite a Xmas.  LatteGirl was still thrilled with what Santa gave her, we had a great day, and everybody was happy.

This Xmas by comparison was easy.  Thanks to the extra week between Thanksgiving and Xmas, I had most presents bought and they were wrapped ahead of time.  This was the first Xmas in I don’t know how long that I wasn’t doing something that required me to stay awake until the wee hours of the morning, such as baking or assembling one of Santa’s gifts, etc.   This year LatteGirl seemed to learn to actually stop and look at what she got when she opened each present rather than unwrapping, tossing on a pile to get to the next present to be unwrapped.

I’ve had signs.  In one case literal, a snarky billboard (or more precisely a picture of a billboard) that I saw somewhere, had the saying on it, “Santa Likes Rich Kids Better.”  Or some excellent blogging, like this wonderful post by Whit that really made me think.  And yet, you would think that after only 5 years, I would remember how tough I had things then, and would be thrilled, and yet I am not.

I know somewhere in here I am supposed to put the requisite message that money can’t buy happiness and all that.  But while true, it is just a bit too cliché, and I am feeling too grumpy today to be cliché.

Well, being able to eat solid food has returned just in time for Xmas.  Yeah me!  But, has left me somewhat of a bad blogger lately, and with everything left to do, precious little time for coherent thought remains, so…. I present Brain dump, bullet style.

• There are a couple of presents that I thought TheWife was getting, and she thought I was handling the purchase of.  Naturally, neither of us actually checked with the other until last night.  Which sent me out to Wal-Mart on the Sunday evening before Xmas.  Which unfortunately yielded far too little in the way of completing the purchases I needed to make, so I will try it again today… elsewhere.
• To the folks at Wal-Mart:  Are you making so much damn money that you can throw away sales?  I was in your store last evening, and the toy department was damn near empty.  The only items left were open/broken boxes, and things that will be on sale at the end of January because nobody is going to buy them.  Oh, I know you have toys.  I saw pallets of them shrink wrapped in the aisles blocking shoppers, and making navigating with a cart practically impossible, so I guess people who went this morning will actually be able to buy something, but I am certain that I was not the only person that left your store with money I wanted to spend, only to be turned away because there was nothing out for me to buy. 
• I am in the office working today.  That precluded me from getting an early jump on the needed shopping.  I will happily shop somewhere that is not competitively priced, if I can just get what I want and get the hell out of the store with my sanity (or what is left of it after Wal-Mart) intact.
• I have spent more on Xmas presents this year than I ever have in the past.  I blame part of this on the ease of Internet shopping, and the extra week between Thanksgiving and Xmas.  The biggest problem was that damned Amazon Prime account I signed up for.  Without having to worry about shipping costs, I could shop and purchase as much or little as I wanted at any time.  This made it much easier to just add “one more item” to buy and ship off way to easy, and it shows with how many “one more items” I had delivered.
• This is the first year I don’t have to stay up late to wrap and/or assemble presents.  This is blowing my mind.  The thought of spending Xmas without being in a Zombie like state from only having an hour or two of sleep sounds really nice.
• As much as everything seems to be going well with the extra week between holidays, I somehow still managed to not find time to bake.  This is the closest thing I have to a regret this year, and when I stop at the bakery and buy some cookies, I am sure I will get over it.
• Did you forget?  You can track Santa Claus’ journey today(night) thanks to the folks at Norad.  There is even a  tracker that will enable you (though Google Earth) to track Santa in 3-D.

LatteGirl had decided she had saved enough and was ready to do a little shopping with her allowance money.  And especially since she did such a remarkable job of clearing out some old stuff, TheWife not only thought it was OK, but made the mind-numbing and quite daring decision to allow this trip to be to Toys ‘R’ Us during the holiday season.

The trip was to get a new doll.  One that “did more” than her current dolls.  She had narrowed it down to two dolls.  Both very similar in what they did (eat, drink, wet, etc), but one was a bit more realistic and demanding than the other.  She selected the lesser of the two dolls. 

She never even looked at the prices of the dolls, so that wasn’t a factor, so I couldn’t help but wonder why she selected the doll that she did, since the other one seemed more real.

“That’s just it,” she replied, “it is too real, I am so not ready to take on that level of responsibility yet.”

As you may have noticed (or perhaps not), my blogging hasn’t been quite regular. That was because we got quite a scare this past week, when our dog Sweetie got quite ill.

So, as to not create any unintended drama, I will say here that she is going to be just fine and is already well on her way to recovery. But, earlier in the week we were not quite so sure. It was odd at first, she wasn’t really showing any symptoms, but she refused to eat. She has done this before, so the first day, we didn’t worry that much about it, but on day 2, we began to get concerned. One day she would skip, but never too, and she was beginning to act a bit lethargic. We tried everything we could to get her to eat, something… anything. Dry food, wet food, treats, and I even went to the store and got some cheese. Nothing. Not a bite. She was still drinking, and would pop up with her usual vigor to go outside so we figured we would just call the vet the next day.  That nigh though, I new something still seemed not quite right, and she was asking to go outside frequently, so I decided to stay and sleep down in the living room.  Well try to sleep, as she continued to get me up almost exactly every 1/2 hour.  Then one time, I didn’t quite get to the door to let her out fast enough.  Blood.  Now I was panicked.

Off to the vet, and it still took a good 24 hours for a diagnosis, which sort of had us preparing for the worst.  She is 10 years old, and has never been the best health specimen in the world.   Through this and up through that first day at the vet LatteGirl was stoic and strong.  But she had assumed that Sweetie would be home from the vet when she got home from school.  She didn’t think much about it through dinner and getting her homework done.  Then she announced she was going to spend some time with Sweetie.  I pointed out that Sweetie was still at the vet, and a meltdown of epic proportions ensued.  She made TheWife stop on the way home from school the next day at the vet to visit Sweetie, but while that helped a bit, as she got tired, she once again melted down that night screaming how she wanted Sweetie home.

Like I said, fortunately this time, we have a happy ending.  Sweetie is back home, and LatteGirl is thrilled.  But I learned some interesting and valuable lessons through this ordeal.  I was reminded that despite her seeming to be 7 going on 21, that LatteGirl is still just child, and that meltdowns are still a way of life at times.  I was reminded, that we have had Sweetie here for LateGirl’s entire life, and she doesn’t know life without her.  When we got our Basset Hound earlier this year, part of the logic TheWife used on me was that Sweetie is not getting any younger, and that having another dog would (hopefully and theoretically) ease that pain a bit rather than having an “empty” home.  I am really starting to doubt that logic.

Another thing I learned is that co-workers can really lack understanding and compassion at times.  Now, I should already know this being a parent.  I work with a lot of young people, many single, and those that aren’t are…um… shall I say chauvinistic?   They have already shown me that they don’t “get” a father that does and “has to be home” for a child as much as I do.  When I say on a particular day I have to be home for LatteGirl, I have heard stupid comments like, “Oh, I didn’t know you were divorced.”  When I say I am not, I will inevitably get asked, “So then where is your wife?”  Thus is the mental capacity of the majority of people I work with on a daily basis.  So, I guess I should not be surprised, when I talk about being up all night with Sweetie or how the vet bill was going to run nearly a thousand dollars, they ask, “why would you do that?  It is just a dog.”  Very little short of the previously mentioned chauvinistic attitude really annoys me more than this.  And this is not tied to male or female.  I guess it is more like pet owner versus non pet owners.  I guess, unless you have lived with a pet for a number of years, you just can’t “get” that this animal is just about every bit as important a family member as anybody else.  I am sure those of you who have pets know exactly what I am talking about.  Those who don’t, well I am sure some of you understand.  For those that don’t… that’s fine… just try and understand it a little from the owners point of view.  This animal is a familiar creature in a person’s life, and losing it will emotionally hurt, so have a bit of compassion.  Because if you don’t, like one person in my office did, if you suggest to, “just throw it out and get a new one.”  You will hear (as he did), so really unpleasant things being said to you (at the very least).

The other thing I learned, is that it is not as stupid as some people think to get pet health insurance.  We use VPI Pet Insurance, but only because they were the first one we found. (Please note that this is not a paid link in any way shape or form, I linked it for your convenience)  There are more providers now, but we have just stuck with what we started.  But as I pointed out, this couple of days in the “hospital” plus medication, prescriptions, etc would run us darn near a thousand dollars.  We will be paying considerably less, thanks to having the insurance.  Much like your own health insurance, it may almost seem wasteful to spend what they charge these days for insurance.  That is, until something happens and you need to pay the bill without it.  I will tell you first hand it is worth it.

So, now we can resume our regular, insane rush to get everything for the holidays with full cheer ahead.

TheWife and LatteGirl were going through LatteGirl’s room looking for books and toys and such that are no longer actively played with. The “baby toys” if you will. Now up until recently, LatteGirl has been quite resistant to parting with virtually anything at all. Not only for wanting to play with them (or claiming she does, despite them just sitting in the corner or on a shelf), but in some cases she had tied memories to certain items (“Remember when I won this at the carnival?”). This changed slightly earlier this year when she discovered her love of cash. The thought of ringing up some money to put in her banks softened her grip on some things and she began willing to part with some things with the express purpose of selling them at a yard sale.

Now, thanks to unfortunate timing, we had the yard sale planned the same weekend TheWife’s step father passed away, and rather than rescheduling the sale, we donated all of the items we were going to sell to the local church that was going to be having a rummage sale. We promised LatteGirl some new toys as well as cash (the cash she got, the toys not quite yet). She was satisfied with the solution, but was clearly disappointed that she didn’t get to go through the motions of actually selling it.

So after that, I sort of expected her to re-tighten her grip on things, and did not expect to see much coming out this time through. This was purely for donation, and there was no cash incentive involved, though TheWife did sort of hint to her that Santa Claus might be a bit more generous if he new she had a place for all the new stuff. But still, like me she has tended to be a pack-rat, and I thought that would continue to hold.

Imagine my surprise when I started seeing bag after bag being placed out in the hallway for me to bring out to the car. I was just completely stunned. Toys of all shapes and sizes, books… some like some “board books” that we had been begging her for ages to get rid of to free up shelf space, Dora things, Blues Clues. Then the biggest shock of all, dolls. Not all of them. She still has her primary “family” of babies, but some of the ones that she never played with, went.

It was about half way through this process, while bringing out another bag, TheWife still in shock from how much they were finally able to agree on getting rid of announced in a quite sullen tone, “She has officially become a “tween” today.” The look of disdain on my face must have been quite clear as she continued, “I know, I know… don’t say it. Just accept it.”

And from the looks of her room, I guess it is true. Winnie The Pooh replaced by Hannah Montana. A draw full of assorted little baby blankets, and accessories to her “baby toys” replaced by nail polish, combs, brushes, head bands, and scrunchies. She offered to get rid of her Barbie Laptop, but only in exchange for a real one. She began exclaiming how many of her friends already have cell phones. And that she thinks needs a phone like a Pink Razor, not one of those “silly ones” like the Migo or the Firefly. (And for the record, NO! I can see no reason for ANY seven… fine… seven and a half year old to have a mobile phone).

I always wondered how people decide when their child becomes a “tween” Now I know. I don’t like it. I am not ready for this yet. I was (as I always seem to be) sure that I had more time before we hit this. But no, it seems to be here… like it or not.

The road to The Little Mermaid on Broadway was obviously bumpy and tense for us the past week.  After getting so excited when when we first got tickets back in September, LatteGirl had been counting down the days.

For the past week though, I have been slowly trying to break it to her that it didn’t look like we were going to be able to see the show.  It is not easy to a child how the show is “there” but not “open.”  And trying to explain why the stage hands went on strike, and what a strike is.

Overall, I guess I had it easy.  I mean, the day they first went on strike, I watched on the news, and saw a woman being interviewed.  She had driven 4-1/2 hours that day up from Maryland with her two kids to see the show.  I can’t even imagine the stress that must have induced, both on the mother and the poor kids.  It was really heartbreaking.

At this point, I was really ready to give up, but just as I have for the last two weeks, before heading off to work, I stopped and checked to see what, if any updates there were on the strike, and saw that they finally came to an agreement and the strike is over.

I don’t know who was more excited.  Me, getting to tell my daughter that we would in fact be going to NYC to see the show this weekend, or her bouncing down the hallway to tell TheWife that we were in fact going again.  Her smile, radiated so brightly that I swear we no longer needed lights on in the house this morning.

So, we will now once again make plans for a trip into NY, try and find a place to dine that won’t bankrupt us, but still will be able to get into with this being tourist season and all.  It should be good and mobbed this weekend around Times Square, and it really makes me question my sanity at the time I purchased these tickets.  But, at the same time, LatteGirl’s smile this morning makes any of that aggravation all worth while.

(I will of course be reviewing the show, probably on Sunday).

It has been one heck of a “weekend” around here, and I feel like I haven’t stopped since Tuesday night. Wenesday and Thursday were obviously all about the cooking. Which amazingly went better, and was more organized than ever. It turns out that I don’t actually have to run around like maniac. I can actually plan out times, and get everything on the table at the correct time, still hot and the earth will not stop spinning casting us all into outer space. Who knew?

But as it has become tradition, the three days following is TheWife’s time to get away from it all. Three days at a spa up in the Catskills of New York (are there other Catskills?), leaving me, LatteGirl and the two doggies. I thought keeping a child entertained would get easier as she got older. More able to entertain herself, and less of a need for Daddy for every activity. But with one small exception that does not seem to be the case around here. If anything, it has been the complete opposite. A few years ago, all I needed was a couple of coloring books, a Bear in the Big Blue House – Dance Party! DVD, and except for the possibility (OK, the it was highly likely) of having to rewind back to the beginning of the Bear Cha-Cha a couple of dozen times, I was usually good until lunchtime to get things done around the house.  That is apparently no longer the case.

We have been trying to keep LatteGirl more active and spending less time in front of the television.  Which is easy during soccer season, or when she has Karate or Dance lessons on Saturdays… of a normal two day weekend.  Now we have three days, and no organized activities.  She finished her homework in about an hour.  She spent another hour or so doing additional math and spelling work in some workbooks we picked up for her (she did this without prodding or coaxing, clearly proving she takes after somebody other than me).  She then declared she was bored, and needed some daddy time.

If it wasn’t for a holiday parade that her school marched in (and another mother took her to), I would have been in some serious trouble.  What did we manage to cram into three days?  Baking Cookies, Painting wooden crafts, we saw Enchanted, we saw Bee Movie, we went bowling, and we put up christmas decorations in the house.  Finally by Sunday afternoon she was finally ready to unwind a bit, and as we embarked on the Christmas decoration part of our weekend, we slowed our pace so that we could watch Frosty, Rudolph, Here comes Santa Claus, and of course Merry Christmas Charlie Brown.

I am so ready to go back to work and get some rest.

Happy Thanksgiving! Just leave those shovels and rakes and implements of destruction home. Then dump is closed.

(Hoping somebody gets this reference)

I love my wife. She is a bright intelligent, well educated woman. Can somebody please tell me then why an automechanic or a contractor can ALWAYS talk her into doing additional work with the line of, “Well if you are doing ____ it only makes sense to _______”

We needed the front stairs repaired. Repaired became replaced. (OK, I can live with that, it did make sense in the long run). But somehow it became, Stairs, Walk Way, Front Sidewalk, and Driveway Apron.

A $500 repair just became a $5000 home improvement.

I know, I know, parents are worried about their kids… and rightfully so.  But there is a point where, when playing the blame game, that you actually, you know, blame the right people.  Of course, it is really easy to just lay all the blame at the feet if China for all the toy recalls and such this year.  But trying to boycott “Made in China” is more than a fruitless quest, it is putting on some serious blinders to some other culprits and accomplices.

If you are at least in your 40s (possibly younger), you remember ads for “Look for the Union Label.”  It was all about pride, and craftsmanship, and having products made safely here.  In those days, imports almost alway had tariffs put on them to help our safe, clean, and law abiding factories compete with the low cost slave labor shops of the times.  That battle has long since been lost on many fronts.  The tariffs began falling away when the corporations here, rather than attempting any longer to compete with these factories, instead opted to use them, and thus American corporations became the major importers, so they had to get the government to lower those tariffs.  And the government complied, most likely with an argument that it was “good for the economy.”

So companies such as Mattel, and Fischer-Price, Wal-Mart, Toys R Us, and other companies fattened up their bottom lines.  Way back when it was “Made in Japan,” until that became too expensive, so it was then “Made in Hong Kong” then “Made in Taiwan” and of course now, “Made in China.”  The never ending pursuit of squeezing another nickel out of every toy made.  But somewhere in this process, something was forgotten.  These corporations seem to have forgotten anything they may have known about doing right by the consumer.  That is a “cost center” and thus, it was all about the price.  Why do anything to make sure the factories you are using over there don’t use lead paints?  Why set up some sort of QA operation that ensures the toys you are importing are actually up to the specifications you supposedly had communicated to these outsources factories?  These are expenses, that is why they don’t do them.

While it is easy to just blame China, and leave it at that (hey why not, that is all you hear about when you read a story or listen to the news), that is simply not true.   Sure, now as a PR stunt after they basically got caught not giving a damn about the consumer, these companies “vow” to ensure that their toys are safe.  But what you don’t hear in that snippet is that thanks to the “added expense” of  making sure they don’t kill their customers, consumer will again take it in the shorts (or more specifically in the wallet) by this time next year when it is anticipated that in order to make “safe toys” consumers will be hit with the bill.  Deflecting blame and  a B.S. story… it is the only thing these companies will give you for free.  So give them something for free.  The blame for these toys.  After all they deserve some “credit” for this fiasco.

As my parents got older, and especially since my father passed away, my sister and I have slowly but surely been taking on more and more of the responsibilities for holiday dinners, and such.  I guess it just seemed logical.  It was our turn to pick up the torch and run with it.  It was now our responsibility to take up the menu planning, and the staying up late baking, and other such thing, so that my parents not only no longer needed to bear the brunt of the expense of these holidays, but more importantly, that they could just sit back and enjoy them.  We were doing them (and in particular my mother) a favor, right?  This is just the way it goes.  Or so we thought.

Even though Christmas dinner is still at Mom’s, we often do a lot more even there.  I bake cakes and cookies, my brother-in-law is a wiz with the Antipasto, and my sister will cook a dish or two, helping to alleviate the pressure and the workload from mom.

In our effort to help though and do what we thought was the right thing, we also as it turns out upset my mother.  Ever since she was diagnosed with cancer, she has been trying to not let it affect her and her routines.  She is very much about her routines and ways of doing things.  And while we thought we were doing what was right, we were also messing with her routines.  She started to feel like we were planning “beyond” her and not letting her do what she wanted any longer.  It was really disheartening when we heard it, and realized that we hurt her feelings so much.

So this year, Thanksgiving is still here at our house, but for Christmas Mom is once again calling the shots.  We are not allowed to do more than ask, “What can we do?”  And if she wants help, she will tell us.  But other than that, she is back in charge for Christmas, and I don’t think she could be happier.

So the moral of this story, as is often the case, is pay attention when you think you are helping.  That person may not actually want your help.

LatteGirl is described as a “hyper-sensitive” child.  (Also known as emotional, but far more so), when you combine that with the effects of “mild” sensory integration disorder you wind up with an emotional cocktail that could melt the heart of all but the most cold hearted people.

In some ways this actually has been a effective tool.  We rarely, have to chastise her about things we want her to do.  And even on those occasions that it is warranted, it takes little more than “reminding her” that she was expected to do something, or not do something.  But we never have to raise our voices.  In truth, we can’t.  It will only open up the flooding of tears as she beats herself up for not being “any good” or “stupid.”

I have been watching a few developing scenarios, and I have discovered something however that is bothering me.  It is starting to look like she is learning how to play us, using this technique.  If it is something that she only half-hearted wants to do (or has to do) such as homework or her keyboard lessons (which was HER choice by the way), then if she is corrected or instructed on anything, she just falls immediately into complete meltdown.

Now normally when she melts down, the only thing to do is to send her off to the sofa or her room to calm down, because there is no way to talk to her or get her to do anything when she reaches that state.  But, now in certain instances like I mentioned, she will melt down to a point where she knows I will say, “Let’s take a break” and she will, and she will recover from it far quicker than usual, and then want to participate in some other activity for her break… such as “Just watch Hanna Montana before we start again.”

I am not happy about this.  It feels wrong.  But at the same time, if try to force her to continue, she will most likely hit a real meltdown state anyway, and it will only increase the non-productive time.  I wish I could tell for sure which is which, and figure out a way to break this habit quickly.

What is Guaranteed to bring a smile to my face regardless of how bad a day it is? I am so heading straight there after work. I am in more dire need a of Triple Venti Ginger Bread Latte than any man in history.

Well, as I continue to ponder whether or not to allow LatteGirl to get wired for music, it seems she has already taken steps in an effort to make the decision for me.

This weekend she confiscated my Zune, and made it her own to listen and bop around the house.  I must admit, I enjoyed both the floor show as she danced about, and was more than happy that she got her fill of music, while I did not have to listen to  the High School Musical 2 soundtrack another thousand times this weekend.

Of course now this tempts me to let her just have the Zune, which would of course give me an excuse to get the new 80 GB Zune player which coincidentally just happens to have a release date a mere two days before my birthday.  That would be an excellent gift to myself I think.  Of course the wife just might hand my head to me if I did that.  And that could be a problem.  It is tough to make use of earbuds, when you head is missing.

I am the proud owner of a ZUNE  (more on that soon).  However, when I purchased a Digital Audio Player (DAP) for TheWife, Zune did not yet offer a flash based player, the style she wanted for workouts and running.  So much to my chagrin, a swallowed hard and bought her an iPod Nano.

Here we are, a year later, and now thanks to my neice having gotten an iPod from her father (my brother in law) last year, LatteGirl has begun hinting that she would like a music player of her own.  Since LatteGirl and I have been doing walks on the days that TheWife has been doing her 5K runs, this has only increased her desires to have the ability to listen to music like mommy does during her runs.

Which brings me to the two part dilemma.  First, TheWife and I are both feel unsure about giving a 7 year old(and a half… sorry honey) a DAP of her own.  TheWife feels it is too indulgent at that age, I am more willing to give into it, so long as she sticks with over the head style headphones and not earbuds.  So question one, how old is old enough for such a thing?  And if it is OK, do we have to start her out with one of those cheesy kid style ones (i.e. Disney Tunes) or do we just go with a normal DAP?

Assuming we go with a normal DAP, that presents dilema number 2.  Most of the music thus far that has been purchased for LatteGirl was done on TheWife’s account… meaning the ever evil iTunes. Sure we can get around that by burning the songs to disk and then ripping them back onto the computer.  And next month (November) Zune will now be offering a Flash based DAP as well.  My inclination of course is to stay away from anything and everything Apple.  But I was the one that bought the Nano for TheWife to begin with, so it is really my fault she is “stuck” with it.  So, do I go with my heart and pick a ZUNE or do I take the easy way out and go the iPod route?  (Just another reason why DRM sucks)

Leopard BSOD
Originally uploaded by akiro.

Somebody at Apple thought it would be funny to show an icon with the Blue Screen of Death for PC Servers. Well, in a bit of kharmic ass biting, it seems that many users upgrading to the latest Apple Leopard, suffered from their own BSOD after the upgrade.

As akiro who was kind enough to share this photo via flickr so nicely puts it, “Betting there will be a new icon in 10.5.1 and one less icon designer at Apple.”

In what should amount to another PR Black Eye to Apple, apparently the company is so worried about people that are buying iPhones, unlocking them and reselling them, that they will no longer accept cash as payment for an iPhone purchase.  You must use a credit card, and only 2 iPhones can be bought on a particular card.  Oh, and before you think you are smart and go purchase Apple Gift Cards (as one user suggested in the comments), it seems that Apple thought of that and will not accept Gift Cards for the iPhone either.

 

Both Cathy and Dad Gone Mad brought up issues recently, that are completely separate with the exception that they are both pet peeves of mine. Pet peeves, because they both wind up making me do or act in ways that I don’t necessarily want to, but seem to bend to the will of others.

First, there is the issue of the “Helicopter Parent.” This is a tough one for me because I straddle such a thin line. LatteGirl is always initially shy around new people, once she warms up she is fine, but she will rarely do it without encouragement and would tend to withdraw if not prompted. Secondly, she wants to much to be accomodating to others she will often wind up rather unhappy when certain kids (including her cousin) tend to take advantage of this “weakness” and boss her around. I don’t want to wind up being (or even appearing to be) a Helicopter Parent, so I have in the past, not exactly fed LatteGirl to the wolves, but I didn’t step in, where I think I probably should have in the past, because of this.

I have also made her be the “bigger person” when another child is rude or such, because it was not my place. This can be quite frustrating. Particularly with some of her friends, that apparently are children of parent’s that don’t seem to see anything their child does wrong, or give the “kids will be kids” explanation.

I still don’t want to be seen as what is (really) a Helicopter Parent, but I also no longer want it to prevent me from being my daughter’s best advocate. One question that goes along with this however. How do you deal with kids that have parent’s that won’t take charge of thier kids ever? For example, is it proper to ask another person’s child to stop screaming? Or to tell them to share? I’m not talking about scolding, but more about playing peacekeeper. What do you do, when it seems like it is always your child that has to make concessions, and “be understanding” with other kids, who apparently are raised by people that don’t have the same common courtesy?

The other issue, is “bragging.” I have read plenty of books, articles and even blogs of people that do a lot of complaining about how much parents talk about (or brag about) their kids. Yet, I know as for myself, and virtually if not every single blog I read, the parents while certainly proud of their kids, often keep it very subdued, if not downright humble. We tend to minimize everything. Or we decide it is “no big deal.” We keep conversations about our kids “short and sweet.” Yes, I know there are people on the other end of the spectrum, people who are sure that their kids are gifted and bound for greatness and already enrolled in the Albert Einstein Program for the Gifted by the time they are 6 months old. But that doesn’t mean I need to compensate by keeping the spotlight off my own daughter at all times.

So, now as he suggested, I am going to put an end to that. (And I of course invite you to do the same, either in comments or your own blog).

LatteGirl is incredibly bright. She is disappointed when she comes home with a less than perfect score on a test (even though we do not in any way put any pressure on her in that way. Matter of fact, we are usually having to tell her that nobody is perfect).

LatteGirl is a good sport. She is not necessarily good at all sports, but she enjoys playing just about anything. She is not the most athletic, her athsma often hampers her, but she gives it 110% always, and has fun while doing it.

LatteGirl is a sweetheart. She has compassion to spare for anybody, everybody, and every creature she encounters. She is friendly (when she gets past her intial shy stage), she will do anything she can to try and make somebody else feel happy, loved, and welcome. She doesn’t hate anybody, and in her 7 year old philosophy, there is nothing in this world that is so bad, that it can’t be fixed with a hug and a kiss.

Your turn.

This past weekend we made a pilgramige out to the farm to go pumpkin picking.  This used to be a favorite activity of mine, getting out to the countryside, spending a leisurely day at the farm.  But it seems that those days are gone for good.  Like many things that are fun family activities, word eventually gets out, and our nice quiet little farm has grown into a huge sucess.  I am happy for them, as anything that supports a local farmer is good in my book.  But at the same time, some of the quiet pleasure has disappeared.

No longer can we just go at our own pace.  No longer is it anything resembling quiet with the number of people that are there.  We used to spend a good 4 or 5 hours just strolling around, seeing the animals, taking the ride out to the field, picking just the right pumpkin, heading back, having some lunch, taking some photos, doing a little bit of shopping at the store.

This weekend we spent the same 5 or so hours.  But rather than it being anything resembling leisurely it, was a hectic race to get from one line to another and wait.  A line to get tickets for the hayride.  Then the line for the hayride itself.  Grab a decent pumpkin and get back on line to get the hayride back.  A line to pay for the pumpkin.  Squeezing through people in the store to do a bit of shopping, only to have to wait on a line out the door to pay for those goods.  We eventually had to split up so that LatteGirl could get on line for a pony ride, while I waited on line for lunch.

All in all a bad day out with the family pumping picking is still better than a good day at the office, but… I still miss when most people just went to the supermarket to buy their pumpkins, and they hadn’t yet discovered the joys of heading out and picking their own pumpkins.

In a way I am thrilled as the more people that buy pumpkins this way, the less of a need there is for shipping pumpkins in from who knows where to stock the supermarket, which benefits the environment as well as the local farmer.  So, I guess I really shouldn’t complain… but I still can’t help missing those good old days.

Moms (and Dads) Gone Bad – I didn’t even get a chance to comment on this story before it was announced that the mother was arrested because she bought some of the guns for this disturbed kid that had apparently been planning a “Columbine like” attack, , and his father faces charges for lying on an application in an attempt to purchase a gun for him back in December of 2005.  The mother has been charged with unlawful transfer of a firearm, possession of a firearm by a minor, corruption of a minor, endangering the welfare of a child and two counts of reckless endangerment.  They should however charge her with consipracy and perhaps aiding a terrorist.  They should most certainly charge her an an accomplice, even though she did not help with the future plans of a attack, just by her actions she is certainly complicit in assisting in his plans.  The father got off easy with house arrest since he did not actually manage to buy his son a weapon.  Just what the heck kind of parents are these?

Just another day with dead students – with stories like the above and it unfortunately becoming all too common, the fact that in Ohio a 14-year old boy killed 4 kids before killing himself, barely broke national news.  They don’t go into much detail other than he was brandishing two handguns.  And I have to wonder yet again, where does a 14 year old, first of all get a gun, and second, the money to buy the gun?

Coulter Culture - It is not everyday that I find a nugget of wisdom in the bile that spews forth from Annie, and admittedly it is difficult on the surface to find anything of value in her latest antisemetic tirade,  but in there, mostly overlooked was something that may very well be true, although she doesn’t really complete the thought.  She says that it would be “easier for the Jews” if they would just convert to Christianity.  When she apologized (of course, her words were as always “misinterpreted”), she “explained” that “Christians just view themselves as perfected Jews.”  Now what I am saying she is right about, is not her main “point” but what she explains as “Christian Views.”  That may of these “Wackjob Christians” like Coulter (I will not saddle all Christians with her particular brand of insanity), actually do believe this.  That they are “perfected” and that anybody that things even slightly different from them is inferior.  Scary people.  Of course, it still boggles my mind that hosts continue to have her on, papers continue to publish her trash, and people still buy her books.  Much like how Sarah Silverman got her own show, I am completely baffled by this.

Gore me to death – I am going to go out of my way this weekend to not watch any news or political type stuff on TV this weekend, because I am certain that all we will see it more about Al Gore and the Nobel Peace Prize, coupled with people from the GOP and Global Warming deniers in general (I’m sure there are at least a couple that aren’t GOP) doing their best to trash him, and once again try to deny global warming, despite the fact that the award going to him really does underline the importance of the issue.  There is nothing new in this arena.  Either you are aware of it, or you chose not to be.  It is that simple.  I’ve already heard this same game played out before, it would be too much like watching reruns of a show you didn’t care for the first time around.  (like Sarah Silverman reruns maybe?)

 More thoughts from the sleep deprived – So sleep has still been a struggle lately, and this is the result.  When you look at your watch to see what time it is, you glance for a second and immediately know what time it is.  Why is it then when somebody ASKS you the time, you have to look, struggle for a second, with a long UMMMMM… It is about… and then FINALLY you can read the time?  Is this some sort of weird performance anxiety?

 Can we make them use their own products? – Why is the line at Starbucks always so long?  Are their employees now so totally repulsed by coffee that they refuse to drink it?  At least here in NJ, they all seem to move in slow motion.  I swear I need to buy a cup of coffee to keep me from falling asleep while waiting to get my coffee.

Will I get “nabbed” again? – It was raining this morning on my way to work.  It stopped by the time I arrived, and now the skies are bright blue.  I wonder if I will be detained (again) at the bus terminal.

At the end of July we found out that TheWife’s Step father was given six months to live.  He requested a family party, to get one more chance to see everybody which we had in August.  But somwhere we still kind of thought that he would be well enough to see still for one more Christmas.  Maybe it was hoping against hope.  But we certainly thought we more time.

TheWife and LatteGirl were supposed to go down for a visit last weekend, but life got in the way, and they decided to reschedule for a couple of weeks later.  We were SURE we have more time, and this was no big deal.

We were wrong.

The phone rang at 11:45 pm last night.  It sounds cliche,  but when the phone rings at that hour, it is never good news.  And of course in this case that held true.  We knew he was brought into the hospital earlier in the day when he began spitting up blood.  Denial once again set in, I suppose, and we believed (wished?) that it was just an episode, and he would be getting some medication and returning home.

It wasn’t to be, and when that phone call came late at night, I knew it as I walked over to pick it up.   I looked at the caller id and saw my mother-in-laws phone number, and any last ditch thoughts of it being something else disappeared.  I steeled myself, and answered.  It went just as you would expect such situations to go.

This is not going to be easy to break to LatteGirl.  She hasn’t seen much of him or my mother-in-law lately, but she has always had a soft spot for him.  I have always said that she could consider herself lucky, in that while most people have two grandfathers, as nice as he was to her, she basically has (uh… had) three.  However, now of course that also means that this is the second of three times we will have to deal with explaining this to her.

He wasn’t always well liked, particularly by TheWife and her sisters, but over the years he mellowed, they mellowed and he eventually fit into the family quite nicely, and was liked by everyone.

He will be missed.

I recently bought tickets for the upcoming debut of The Little Mermaid on Broadway.  We got 1st balcony tickets and they ran about $90 a piece.  Expensive?  Yes, but I didn’t expect to find discount tickets for a show that has yet to appear, and since that is what tickets generally run, I was not at all shocked.  Not happy… but not shocked.

Then came the request for tickets for Hannah Montana.  It would be an early Christmas present for LatteGirl.  OK, I thought.  No big deal.  But imagine my surprise when I discovered that tickets for this concert would cost MORE than a Broadway show!  It took about 1/2 hour once the tickets went on sale before I was able to secure tickets.  Upper Level at the new Prudential Center that will be opening (theoretically) this week.  Read that again… UPPER LEVEL!  Cost? $120 a piece.  For Hannah Montana!   Now, I understand I am old now… but I don’t think if I add up the cost of every concert I have ever attended, that it would cost more than the $240 I had to lay out for this one event.

I was even more shocked when I heard that the concert sold out in a hour, and that tickets were now being given away on local radio stations, just like “real” concert tickets.  I guess at these prices that this is a real concert, but somehow it just doesn’t seem the same thing to me.  I saw this much more like a “Kiddie Concert” but I guess I was wrong.

I thought I had seen (and heard it all) when it came to telemarketing.  Every time I  think they have sunk as low as they can possibly go, the prove me wrong, and reach a whole new level a sleeze.

HSBC Bank has come up with a new way to reach new lows that will be  difficult  (I won’t say “impossible”  any longer)  to  beat.  Tonight I answer the phone, and get what starts to sound like a typical sales call, and I am ready to quote the law and the fact that I have already asked to be placed on their do not call list, when I realize that the person on the other end of the phone isn’t exactly replying exactly to what I am saying, but something I can only deem as “close.”

At first I think, it is just some new guy that is sticking a little too close to the script and not listening.    But then he replies to one comment with a completely different reply and a chuckle.  And I think to myself, “Wait a minute.”  So, I ask “Are you a real person?”  The line gets static and after a pause, he says “Yes, this offer is real.”

Bingo!

There wasn’t even a telemarketer on the other end of the phone.  Now I can’t even try and feel sorry for somebody that is just trying to earn a living and doing their job.  Now it is nothing but a talking computer with a voice recognition algorithm trying to “understand” what I am saying.

Tomorrow I am closing all my accounts at HSBC.  That is just plain wrong!

I am not allowed to attend LatteGirl’s Soccer games.  This decree was handed down by TheWife, as she felt that I may pressure  LatteGirl too much.  But the truth is, it doesn’t seem that I need to pressure her at all.  I would however most likely be one of “those dads” that talks too much on the sidelines about what the coach should be doing.

More proof of this came this past week.  LatteGirl had expressed some interest all the way back to last year about being a goalie.  However, the fact that she was one of their best scorers kept her up front all year.  Things looked like they would head down the same path this year as she scored a goal in the first game.  This past week however, the goalie did not show up, and the coach allowed LatteGirl to be goalie.

When I first heard about this after the game I became quite annoyed as I couldn’t understand the logic.  Why would he take one of his best goal scorers and essentially take them away from scoring goals.  When I heard the score was 1-0, I continued with “See, this is what happens.”

But… They won.  In her first game in goal, LatteGirl had a shutout.  Now, I am quick to admit that a shutout in a 7 year old league is far more about luck and your teammates than it is about the goalie,  (Still… It took me almost 4 years of high school soccer before I got my first shutout.) but she still was thrilled.  And how could I not be thrilled for her?  So now I jokingly told TheWife that the coach has a “goalie controversy” on his hands.

She just looked at me… shook her head… and mumbled as she walked away, “THIS is exactly why you are not allowed to go to her games.”

It has been a crazy couple of weeks for me with clients, and deadlines, and the like, but hopefully everything is back to normal… for me at least.  Thus my erratic postings should now be a bit more… regular.  Finally getting to peek out at the world around me… I have found that things are just plain nuts, and I guess I shouldn’t complain about being nuts at work. 

Woman runs over own legs – I don’t know what bothers me more about this story.   The fact that somebody could be stupid enough to find a way to drive over their own legs… or the fact that I feel quite certain that some lawyer will find a way to bring a lawsuit against somebody on her behalf.  You know something along the lines of, “There should be a sticker clearly emblazoned on the door that warns the user of the risks involved in getting out of the vehicle you are driving while it is still in gear, thus Chevrolet (she was driving a Blazer) should pay her $100 million for pain and suffering and promise to put warning stickers on all future vehicles.”  You may laugh now, but just think… there is a reason why Preparation H has a warning on its product warning to “Not take orally.”

DirecTV illegally calls people on Do Not Call List – So first DirecTV calls people on their own internal Do Not Call List.  Then they try to justify it, by saying it is not a “sales call” but a customer service call to see if you still want to be on their Do Not Call List.  What part of Do Not Call, do they not understand? (Full Discloser:  I have DirecTV myself.  I am not a fan of the Company or its owner, but hate them less than Comcast.  At least so far.)

Woman arrested for chasing children with a Sword – Fortunately no children were hurt when Amanda Harris apparently lost her brains, but that may have been sheer luck.  When taken into custody she told police that she should have hurt some of the “illegals” if she had known she was going to be arrested.  Even scarier… she was (I’m guessing the publicity will lead to her termination) employed by a Pre-School.

“Childrens do Learn” – Yup, that is your President, at it again, using his own stupidity (albeit unwittingly) to show how important an education really is while trying to drum up support for his woefully flawed No Child Left Behind.

Woman Gives Birth to own Grandchildren – While it certainly  sounds like a punchline out of the Blue Collar Comedy tour, this is not a Redneck joke.  This Brazilian Woman, acting as a surogate for her daughter, gave birth to her own twin “grandchildren.”  Am I the only one that just finds this just plain… icky somehow?

Maybe I should stick my head back in the sand… or at least try not to take in so much all at once.

The most high profile case of a company offering the President’s “brilliant” idea of the Health Care Savings Accounts and Low Cost, High Deductible plans is (no surprise here) Wal-Mart.  Wal-Mart of course used these plans to “promote” the ability of their workers to get some sort of health insurance, and try to take some pressure off of themselves.  But, when you actually look at them, you see just how deficient these programs are.

Industry monitors put Wal-Mart’s wages at $8.23/hr., however Wal-Mart puts this at $9.68/hr (UFCW) so in the spirit of fairness, I will go with the higher wage.  A Full-time employee at Wal-Mart works 34 hours per week (Wal-Mart 2006 Associate Guide), so that works out to $329.12/week or $17114.24 annually.  Now let us grab a minimum of 22% for the combination of Federal/State and other taxes, leaving $13,349.10.  Premiums that must be paid by an individual is $22/month  or $265/yr (Wal-Mart Facts), leaving our fair worker $13,084.10 (about $251 a week).

With that of course you have to take care of silly things like rent.  The Average rent across the country was $940/month at the end of 2005 (http://realestate.msn.com/Rentals/Article.aspx?cp-documentid=262101), but let assume that our worker understands he can’t afford average working at Wal-Mart and finds some dump for $500/month, that still leaves him(or her of course), with just over $7K for everything else… food, clothing, gas (or public transit costs), and so on.

So now our worker gets sick.  (Which of course we have not considered lost wages)  out of that remaining $7,000 the first thousand (per person, if this is a family of 3, then it is the first $3,000) must go towards the deductible before the insurance actually kicks in.  Tell me, if this was you, could you find a way to save  thousand(s) of  dollars for your deductible?

Wal-Mart doesn’t care about their employees.  I am breaking no new ground her, sites like Wake Up Wal-Mart,  and books like “The High Cost of Low Prices” have been documenting these abuses for years.  No rather, what I am trying to use this (unfortunate) example of is the plans that are still trying to be sold to us under the guise of “health-care reform.”  In this example, the worker, because he (she) is paying “virtually nothing” (according to the rich people that are promoting this junk), they are supposed to be able to put money into a “health-care savings account”  (“certain fees may apply of course”) to help “offset” the cost.  But just where is the saving supposed to come from.  Are you supposed to “hope” you don’t get sick until you happen to have enough in the account to cover it?  Put off having a baby because you need to save up who knows how much before you have enough banked health-care?

This is not the answer to a health-care crisis.  It is a plan to line the pockets of insurance companies, and to provide cover for corporations like Wal-Mart to show that they offer plans for their employees with minimal to no cost.  It is a game, and one most people can’t afford to play.

I have to admit, I followed into Facebook like a lemming, but unlike when I set up a Myspace page, I was actually happy I followed along, as I mentioned previously, it seemed to be that Facebook was like MySpace for intelligent people.  But it would seem that the intelligent part stops at the user interface, as some of the decisions that I have seen coming out of Facebook lately have left me scratching my head.

First of all, the seemingly stupid story where Facebook apparently didn’t learn a lesson from the debacle that hit LiveJournal a year ago, and decided that a picture of a woman breastfeeding is against their Terms of Service because it is obscene.  I have linked to some better sources on this already, and there are more popping up, as the likes of this conversation with Facebook representatives.  Motherhood Uncensored suggests just deactivating your account.  Now I have to admit, I have not done so (yet), and thought the measure a bit extreme.  But this not the end.

While Facebook apparently is making the world safe from the sight of breastfeeding because it is a “family friendly” sight, that hasn’t stopped them from ignoring reapeated requests from the NY Attorney Generals office investigating the company to ensure they are taking proper measures to keep kids safe from online predators.  So now Facebook is being subpoenaed for the records.

In case that isn’t enough to get you scratching your head, this next piece of news certainly will, if it doesn’t have you running to remove your profile.  It seems that now Facebook has decided to make profiles available to Search Engines.  Privacy be damned I guess.  You have to specificaly OPT OUT of the new program if you don’t want your “Name” or Picture showing up n a search engine.  Depending how much of your information they are going to let the Search Engienes have, a lot of information will be out there in what I can only describe as a telemarketers dream come true.

Add to that, the fact that people are already getting leery of Facebook because of the proposed influx of cash by Microsoft , where Microsoft will (if it goes through) own 5% of Facebook; and potentially you have a real chance of a major exodus of users, at least until Facebook earns some credibility back.

It is off to the city that doesn’t sleep for me today, so instead I am going to point you over in the direction of Creative-Type Dad that has an excellent post up (and just in time for Halloween Costume Shopping), where he points out When The Kids’ Halloween Costume Cost More Than My First Car, Something Is Seriously Wrong. Go on over and check it out, and chime in. How much do YOU spend on your kids Halloween Costumes?

“School’s Open… Drive Carefully” We have all seen the warning for years now, but I never quite understood it. What are they trying to say? We can’t afford grief workers for the other students, so please only run the little buggers down during the summer?

That being said, there are a few more signs that autumn has arrived.

5. All the MDA telethon donation shamrocks are finally taken down.

4. The only backpacks and luchboxes left in stores are ones that have chacters from this past summers box office bomb.

3. Bloggers start making inane lists into posts.

2. All the beautiful colors… the browns and golds that are starting to appear… in the seasonal aisle at Target.

1. Pumpkin Spice Lattes return.

So what are your sure signs of fall?

An alternate title for this could very well be, “What do we do next year?”

Well, today LatteGirl returns to school.  Yesterday she was of course lamenting the end of summer vacation as we were going through the checklist of back to school items to pack in her backpack.  So, as we were doing this she complained, “I can’t believe that summer is over already.  I mean, we didn’t even get to do anything yet.”

After retreiving my jaw back off the floor where is landed, I asked her to explain.  Now I should point out that last summer, she went to Day Camp 4 days a week, and Fridays she and TheWife would do something together (usually).  This year however, she requested to go to camp 5 days a week because she felt that she had missed out on so many things that her friends got to do on that day that she wasn’t there.  So, she felt that there were a lot more trips that should have been made.

That being said, this was a rather expensive and busy summer around here.  Since school got out we have made trips to Buskill Falls, Disney World, a couple of trips to the beach, Chestnut Grove Resort in the Poconos, Mountain Creek Waterpark and Six Flags Great Adventure (where we will also be returning this weekend as well).  She has visited Adventure Aquarium, Turtleback Zoo, and the Bronx Zoo.  With camp she has gone swimming at 4 different lakes, been ice skating, bowling, roller skating, and more.

Hell, as we slip into September, I am starting to regret the purchase of the new pool, because between feeling like we were always on our way somewhere, LatteGirl being “all swimmed out” from trips to the lake, and weather that kept the pool a little cooler than we had hoped most of the year, the amount of use pool saw this year was nominal.  I spent more time keeping the pool clean than anybody spent actually in the pool.

Now I know that when back to school time arrives, no kid is happy about it, and summer always is “too fast” and the knee jerk reaction is to say they did “nut in’” all summer.  But park of me is thinking, if she felt she was bored this year.  I better get a second job to start paying for next year, because what the heck are we going to do for an encore to try and improve on this summer?

With the 3 day weekend, I took part of it for an opportunity to rewire (well technically unwire) my network, reconfigure and rename all the computers on the network.

TheWife’s new laptop machine is now “SnowWhite,” while LatteGirl’s Desktop is “KimPossible”  My old laptop has become “Mater”  (as in ‘Tah’-mater, but without the ‘Tah’)

Now the useless trivia question of the day, “What did I name my new Laptop?”

(hint for those that have paid attention, it is a character from my favorite Disney Movie.  Full Disclosure – you won’t find it by searching for “Favorite Disney Movie” on this blog, but I have mentioned in the past)

Death and dying is a subject I have broached more than I care to admit on this blog.  My father’s passing, dealing with LatteGirl  and her understanding  (or lack of) on the matter, my mother’s tenous health,  an  uncle that had to be placed into an “induced coma” because of the pain (but somehow managed to turn it around and survive it).

Death for me has come, for lack of a better word, “easy” to some degree.  From the time I was 9 through about 13 I spent more time in funeral homes than I think most people should have to for their entire lives.  It seemed at the time that I was back at the one place that both sides of the family used as their “regular” funeral home.  By the time the “older generation” was done dropping like flies, I knew the place intimately.  The smoking lounge (hey this was the late 70′s early 80′s and yes you could actually still smoke indoors), where they stored extra boxes of tissues, where the office was, the water cooler, which rooms were the bigger ones, how many displays it actually took to make a flower car look full, and so on.

However, none of that prepared me for what I was to face on the first day of our vacation, in which we had to make a detour to my in-laws for a family reunion, hastily put together when it was discovered that my step-father-in-law has lung and kidney cancer (just found out about the kidney part).

This may have been the single most uncomfortable event I have ever attended.  The tension was amazingly palpable as everybody was keenly aware, but very few were willing to mention that big pink elephant in the middle of the room. The only way I can describe it, would be attending a funeral repast, and the deceased sitting there dining with you.  Oh, my step-father-in-law was acting cheerful enough, and generally smiled most of the time.  But you knew he didn’t look quite “right,”  not sick per se, but certainly frail for a man that has never looked that way before.

Conversations were guarded, and many abruptly ended when talks of things like “future plans” accidentally came up, presumably people feeling (and probably rightfully so) that it was rude to talk about what you plan to do “next year” when you are at a party for a man that may not see the end of this one.

We did not (at their request), inform LatteGirl of “Pops” condition.  Which was probably a smart move with her being as over-sensitive as she is.  However this was also cause for some confusion for her later.  Since we still needed to get to the Poconos and check in, we were the first ones to leave.   It was at this point that some of the masks started to drop.  Tears were shed as who knew when or if we would ever have an opportunity to see him again.   Of course LatteGirl, without knowledge as to why people were crying, was quite confounded by it all.  She couldn’t understand why people were sad that we were going on vacation.

TheWife has never been particularly close with her step father (she and her sisters all wore black when their mother married him), but he is a jovial and likable fellow (particularly now when he is sober), and a lot of bitterness is now of course being overlooked, and I guess, it is tough to hate somebody who you are watching slowly die.  (Well, I can think of a few cases where I could hold my anger but that is for a different day and post).

I don’t know that there was any way to make this any less uncomfortable, or if  I had to do it all over again that I would (or could) do anything different.  I don’t know what if anything we should do now.  All I know for sure, is no matter how confident I feel that I have “seen it all”… something will come along to prove me wrong.

Sorry, my plans to update as this vacation went along were dashed along with a lot of hopes and dreams and plans I had for this vacation.  I’d like to say no worse for the wear, but that simply isn’t the case.  Vacations are supposed to be fun, and refreshing, and relaxing and other such happy things.  Right?

Well, they were… for TheWife… and for LatteGirl.  Me, not so much.  As I noted in my last entry, things got off to a rocky start.  Well, from there things only seemed to go downhill.  The upside, is that the MCL is not torn, so no surgery is in the (immediate) future.

The symptoms of concussion though became more clear once I was no longer so focused on the pain in my knee, and I got the joys of all of that for a day or two.  Fortunately Monday and Tuesday were complete washouts thanks to the rain, so it gave me little incentive to do anything but try and rest up.   However a little tickle then hit the back of my throat.  Didn’t think much of it at first, but it got progressively worse as time wore on.

By Tuesday evening, I could no longer swallow anything solid.  By Wednesday I could no longer even sip on water.  And I was starting to feel warm.  Yup, 104 degrees warm.  And that being after moutains of Tylenol and a cold shower.  So we seek out whatever doctor we can find in the “Greater Swifterwater, PA” area.  They originally said could not take me, but after me then asking where I could find the closest hospital or morgue, they took pity on me and found me a slot.

I started to question the decision, when the doctor finally came in.  Now, I am in no way a racist person, but this lady doctor was such a stereotype rolled up into a person, I would classify her as a Chinese Characature of Chinese Stereotypes.  Not that this is necessarily a bad thing, but as she looks at my chart, she looks at me and says (say this too yourself in your favorite “chinese restaurant voice”)  “ohhhhh…. you sick.  You have big feevah.  I bet you no feel good.”

But, mannerisms, and smirking over this, s