She knows how to butter ‘em up
LatteGirl: We have a new girl in our class
Me: Oh, Yeah?
LatteGirl: Yeah, she is from Korea and she is real nice. But my teacher says she needs to be fattened up a little.
Me: Why is that?
LatteGirl: Because she is so tiny and skinny. She is almost as skinny as mommy.
And I am now pretty sure anything LatteGirl asks for from now at least through the end of the week, her mom will be more than happy to indulge her in getting.
Medals gained and friendships lost
Well, as I mentioned last week (has it really been a week already? I have go to find a way to find more blogging time), LatteGirl went off to Lake Placid to compete in the ISI Lake Placid Championships. Without trying to sound to braggy (but how could I not be at least a little braggy), she came home with 3 gold medals and a silver in the four events she entered.
Obviously, she was also thrilled. But besides being tired (on the last day they went snow tubing before a 5-1/2 hour ride home), there was a certain… I don’t know what to call it, really… listless undertone to her mood. What could make a child who just did so well in her competition, had fun swimming (she has continued her streak of swimming in every hotel pool she has ever had the opportunity to swim in… be it frozen for ice, or warm for swimming, apparently you just can’t keep my child away from water). So what could this reservation in her jubilation be? She denied it at first, so I didn’t push the issue.
The following morning, I inquired again, and I found out the problem. It seems there was another girl that is from her skate club that was signed up and in all the save events (and same “flight” as they call it), as LatteGirl… meaning they were competing head to head in each of the 4 events along with other girls from other skate clubs. As I pointed out earlier, LatteGirl came home with 3 gold and a silver. This other girl, whom LatteGirl only knows because they have the same coach, but LatteGirl still considers a “friend” came home with 3 silver and a bronze. Do you see where this is headed?
Yeah, by the time the trip was over and they were heading home, her friend was no longer speaking to her, and in fact was giving her dirty looks whenever LatteGirl looked in her direction. This troubled her. She didn’t like that fact that her friend was mad at her, but couldn’t reconcile what she should have done differently. She believes you should always do the best you can, and besides, this competion, the judges just decide on a winner… there is no scoreboard of points to look at to judge a “level” So she really couldn’t throw one of the events if she wanted to (there was no way that was going to happen, she is every bit as competitive as I am, and letting up is just not her style), and besides just because she may have thrown an event doesn’t mean that the judges might not have given the medal to somebody else anyway.
It is a shame. I have always tried to instill good sportsmanship in Lattegirl, but it seems to me that this girl’s parents didn’t bother to teach her good manners or how to be a good sport.) I tried to reassure her that eventually this little girl would probably move on and eventually forget all about coming in behind LatteGirl at every event this time, and who knows, at the next competion she may be the one that comes out on top.
["Not a chance," she says, "next time I will be even better." ]
Yup she is my child alright
Yes, more ice skating posts
I am sure some people will be getting sick of these posts, but I still get quite excited when LatteGirl has these ice skating events. Every event (so far) is bigger and more special than the last. I guess I will stick on this course for about a year (so let me apologize in advance), and then once these get into re-runs, it won’t be such a big deal.
But I feel bad that I cannot attend this one. LatteGirl and TheWife have headed off on their own o Lake Placid. This is not really all that much different than the event she went to in Yonkers. Except it is bigger, with far more competitors from all over the country.
So they are there, and I am here. I will be missing today’s competition due to firewall issues, but tomorrow I will get to watch her skate via Webcast (Yes, this event has a webcast that they sell tickets to). So, at least I will get to see it even if I can’t be there in person, but I still really wish I could have made the trip. Of course somebody has to pay for all these excursions… so I will try to enjoy it as best I can via the Webcast.
There are definitely some benefits to leaving me behind. I have been such the nervous one since she started competing. She has managed to be as cool as can be. So far, she has manged to avoid picking up my nervousness, but if I was around, it would probably only be a matter of time until she decided that if I was so nervous, that perhaps she SHOULD be, and I don’t want that to happen.
Of course, I can try and console my “poor me” factor (and after the expense of this trip, I really mean POOR me), with the fact that I have the house to myself for a day and half (they come home on Sunday). Well, only me and the dogs, and fortunately they are not talking. (Oh, please lord don’t turn this into a Bush’s baked beans commercial on me). So perhaps I will drown my “sorrows” by stopping for a micro-brew or six, order in some sort of greasy foodthing in and pretend like this was my plan all along and this is how I really wanted it to be. Yeah, that sounds good. And besides, I will see her tomorrow… even if it is on a webcast.
Balancing Santa and reality
In some ways I consider myself lucky that at 8 years old, LatteGirl still believes in Santa Claus. At least for one more year we can keep this charade alive. Reality and real life will seep in soon enough and take away some of her childhood innocense, and anything that can beat that back for just a little bit longer is fine with me.
She is already feeling a bit conflicted with messages from both school and Sunday school, being told the Christian mythology that Jesus is the “reason for the season.” (Please, stop the e-mails, I am not condemning any religion, but the fact is that the celebration of Jesus’ birth celebration was assigned to conincide with the Yule season. And besides, it isn’ t the point). Like many people, the holiday season this year will be cut back a bit as we tighten our belts and deal with economic uncertainty. But how do you explain and rationalize that with a child that believes in Santa Claus?
We have told her (as we have over the past couple of years) that the more expensive the gifts she asks for, the fewer in number she will actually receive. However, in the past, she just accepted this at face value. Now however, we have to balance reasoning and questioning. Why? Santa doesn’t “buy” gifts, he “makes” them, so why does cost matter?
The expense has also put a crimp in one other tradition I had started with her a few years back, where I get her to pick out at the store, one gift that she would “really, really, really” like to have, purchase that gift, and then she puts it into the Toys for Tots collection bin. It serves at a reminder to be kind to those that are less fortunate, and also (I hope) reminds that giving isn’t just about giving up what you don’t want anymore. (After all it is much easier to give a toy that she doesn’t actually want or like, but I try to stress to her if she would like it, so would some other child that perhaps wouldn’t get such a nice gift). This of course is not as easy since her taste has gotten a bit more expensive. Sure, I would love to buy a Wii a donate it, but I just don’t have that kind of money to throw around. Also, now she queries why Santa give less to poor children.
How do you do it? How do you instill good values, teach about being good to others, teach understanding of economic issues, stay on budget, and still keep it so that it doesn’t completely destroy the magic? I am open to suggestions.
The best compliment ever
This past weekend marked four years since my father passed away. As is typical (since we are closer) after visiting the masaoleum, my mother and aunt came back to the house for dinner.
LatteGirl was not much in the mood for eating and after querying her to what was wrong, she bemoaned the fact of how much she missed Poppie. My mom gave her a hug, and while stating that she missed him too, that if LatteGirl wanted to know what Poppie would do or say to just look at me, since I was just like him.
While I don’t completely agree with that assesment, and still don’t believe I can hold a candle to my father, I don’t think there is a better compliment I could ever receive.
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