Why is wishing someone well offensive
It is that time of year. That post where I get berated for being inclusive instead of exclusive. I hear how offensive it is to wish someone to be well, and to have a Happy Holiday. Yes, once again, more people are joining in on the faux War on Christmas. This game, started (as far as I know) by Bill O’Reilly, a man so whacked, that even the top brass at Fox News don’t like him, has now been carried on by others, including this year, a particularly idiotic piece by Michael Reagan.
I find it “particularly idiotic” because he is clearly transparent in his attack. He blames “a handful of secular progressives who loathe Christianity and any celebration associated with it.” Apparently, it would never pierce his thin skin to realize that a Jewish person may not want to be wished a “Merry Christmas” any more than he would like to be wished a “Happy Kwanzaa.” He doesn’t want to appear quite this crass, so he tries to bury the whole thing as people out to “destroy Christmas.” While I do not doubt or deny there may be a few nuts out there that have this thought, most simply would like to be recognized for their beliefs even if they aren’t Christian. Recognition that while a majority of people may in fact be Christian, we are not a theology, and that their rights and beliefs are not any better or worse.
For all his claims to the otherwise, nobody is actually attempting to stop anybody from having a Merry Christmas, or for Christians to celebrate and recognize Christmas as the high holy holiday that it is for them. They just don’t want to participate (and perhaps that is the problem for single minded morons like this).
He forgets, while claiming that it is “a birthday not a holiday” that the holiday has been around much longer. I won’t go into the details about previous silliness or the historical moving of Jesus’ birthday to coincide with the holiday, I have documented that previously, and most rational folks already know this. But apparently he doesn’t see the irony in his own statements:
My fellow Christians should join me in pledging never again to shop in any commercial establishment where the clerks greet us with that “Happy Holiday” greeting as an insult to our religious beliefs, just as we must defend the exhibition of the menorah or other Jewish symbols at Hanukkah.
Just what Jewish symbols is he supposedly defending by demanding that it is “Merry Christmas” or nothing? And am I the only one that finds it humorous that he complains that about people being “forced” into saying “Happy Holidays” but now he wants to blackmail commercial establishments by threatening to not shop their unless he is greeted as he expects. And he goes on to say, “Have a Merry Christmas. And don’t be afraid to say that loud and clear to everyone.” That’s right. Don’t give a damn about who you may offend, because you are a Christian, and as such have a right to offend whomever you wish, at least according to Reagan.
So why is this? Why is it that being inclusive to spread love to everyone so darn “offensive” to some Christians? Does “Peace on Earth and goodwill toward man” only apply to a select few? As the old saying goes, “Can’t we all just get along?” Do you really need to have a crusade?
Whether it is Happy Hannukah, Merry Christmas, Blessed Yule, Happy Kwanzaa, I wish you and yours the best for a happy and healthy Holiday Season.
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9 Responses to “Why is wishing someone well offensive”
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Nice post. This issue really ticks me off too. If I know someone celebrates Christmas, I’m the first to say Merry Christmas. But if I don’t know them, I think that would be inappropriate.
Here in the Northeast, I think people like you and I are glad to say we encounter Christians, Jews, Muslims, and others. That’s why I proudly stick with Happy Holidays. I think it’s the Christian thing to do.
I agree with everything you just said. Yes, this country was founded on Christian principles but we are also considered the “melting pot”. That does not mean that every one living in America must commit to those founding principles. We are the only country that exhibits this behavior. As Christians we are supposed to be “Christ-like” who accepted everyone. However, we don’t have to try and convert every person we meet either!
I proudly stick with you….Happy Holidays!
I can’t, for the life of me, ever actually talking to someone who didn’t like to be wished “Merry Christmas”. Or, for that matter, don’t know anyone who has ever had someone else tell them they didn’t like to be wished “Merry Christmas”. And certainly not because the other person was Jewish, or Muslim or anything else. Any rational person would understand the spirit in which the sentiment was expressed.
While I’m sure there are such people out there, I think it is much less widespread than people assume. Often you hear of an activity being curtailed or eliminated because “someone might be offended” or worse, might sue. Perhaps this happened once or twice in another part of the country, or some time ago. Not because it’s a frequent occurrence, but because someone “might” be offended. All this accomplishes is to elevate the problem way, way beyond its actual seriousness and call attention to it in a way it doesn’t deserve.
If you went out and randomly polled 1000 people and asked them if they like being wished “Merry Christmas”, I would imagine 999 of them would say they liked it, or didn’t mind or have an opinion one way or another. You’d have one crank that might object, but that’s about it.
So why does this make it such an epidemic that it’s being made out to be?
Barry, perhaps Darren is correct in that we experience it more in the Northeast than in other places, but I have certainly met MANY people that do not appreciate being wished a “Merry Christmas” and point out to the speaker that they are Jewish or Muslim or something else.
In a few cases it is true that others will just acknowledge that the sentiment is in the right place, and that Christians are just too egotistical to realize that there are other religions than theirs, so they don’t bother to correct them. This may be why you find it “far less widespread than people assume.”
The funny part is, that “Happy Holidays” is encompassing in that it is intended to INCLUDE all, including Christmas, but it seems to those that are crying “war on Christmas” nothing is satisfactory unless their religion gets “top billing.”
In the end, what is funny, is that to the best of my knowledge nobody is “boycotting” Xmas (OK, maybe a couple of fringe nuts), but there is no concerted effort to stop stores from saying Merry Christmas or we won’t shop there, but the opposite is certainly true. How do you have a war with only one side fighting?
Don’t confuse this with me saying that people “must” say “Happy Holidays” I have no problem with people saying Merry Christmas, when appropriate, I will do it myself. But why is fair to say that people (and business) MUST say Merry Christmas?
Who’s saying they MUST say anything seasonal at all? I don’t think I inferred that from anything I read or have heard. However, people shouldn’t be discouraged from saying it, for business reasons, on the off-chance someone “might” find it offensive.
I can’t help but imagine what a sad, cynical culture it must be in the NE when someone is wished – with sincerity – “Merry Christmas” and its taken as a slight against my religion.
Ah, but see this is why I am complaining about it. We are not in as much of a disagreement than it would seem at first blush. It is people like Reagan, and Bill O’Reilly that started this, calling for boycotts of stores that say “Happy Holidays” instead of “Merry Christmas.”
I am not picking on you personally, but imagine somebody walking up to one of these complaining Christians and saying “Happy Hannukah.” I will bet you that the first words out of their mouths would be “But I am not Jewish.”
I completely agree, that whether it is in the North East, or any place else it is quite sad, that somebody can’t appreciate the sincerity behind well wishes. But that is just as true with “Happy Holidays” as it is with “Merry Christmas.”
I guess I just hate changing your own policies based on someone’s own weaknesses. In essence enabling their lack of cultural and personal understandings, and playing on their own paranoia and suspicions creates a worse situation than you’re trying to avoid.
It’s not an obvious case of changing a phrase because people WILL be offended. It’s changing the phrase because they MIGHT be offended. We do or don’t do so many things these days because someone MIGHT be offended, that traditions die, cultural divides widen and misunderstandings grow.
Do you, or anyone else, have any links to blogposts, news articles, webpages, etc – anything from anyone that actually objects personally to any of these sentiments? All I ever see is reactionary sentiments to “those people out there” but rarely from “those people” themselves…
I don’t, have the links you wish, but Google is good for such things. Look for the Atheist group that had their display in Washington stolen. Look for the people that asked to have a menorah placed in an airport that rather than agreeing, took down the Christmas trees. But my point as I mentioned previously is that there is NO “War on Christmas” and nobody is trying to get it “banned” from the lexicon. Plus for many it has become a secular gift-giving holiday anyway. (Which then brings in the whole “reason for the season” crowd which is where I start to become disagreeable and annoyed).
Now this is where we will start to disagree. Why is anybody that does not wish to say “Merry Christmas” lacking in culture or personal understanding? Because they… or fine, allow me to say it, I don’t believe the same as “you”? (You know what I mean, about “you” right?) Happy Holidays, Blessed Yule and other sayings has been around as a holiday greeting as long (if not longer) than “Merry Christmas.” And “culture”? How many items associated with Christmas have been taken from other cultures, traditions, festivals.
The only misgiving and divide here is that while Christmas is smack dab in the middle of many cultural and/or religious holidays, it is only the Christians that believe their holiday need to be “protected” and held above others. Your Holiday is Christmas, mine is yule, and the person over there is celebrating Kwanzaa. So, where is culture “lost” by simply saying “Happy Holidays” that includes everybody? Where is that making anything less of Christmas? You are included, not excluded. (Again, not you but “you” just to be clear)